Discussion » Health & Fitness » Chinese guys & white girls

  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    It is quite common in Australia to see Asian-girl-White-guy couples, so im sorta talking about the other way round here.

    Well, Im a normal chinese guy originally from Beijing, Xi'cheng District, to be more exactly. I spent 22 years living in Beijing and then suddenly my life was totally changed after I made up my mind to go overseas...

    I do admit that I was attracted by caucasian girls when I just got here, simply quoting the words from one of my friends " white girls r just something in our life that we have never been able to be so close to since our birth."  and Yes, it turns out he's right. Thats just a phase of curiosity. Honestly, my curiosity towards white women is gone in a year and eventually I found out that im still attracted more by Asian girls..........(im not racist or anything so please do not bombard me with nasty words.....)

    However, everything is just not all cut and dry.............

    see, last semester we had a combined class with students doing Japanese translation and interpreting....(i was doing chinese translation and interpreting at that time.) I had a very good impression with all the students. they were nice, friendly, not that arrogant as Korean and incredibly courteous. Some of em r just japanese while some r australian and Newzealanders who have lived in Japan for quite a long time. Then we became friends, we hang out, we party and we do all sorts of things together.......But I never realised someone had kept an eye on me.....til one day she just spoke that out in front my face that she had a crush on me..........at that moment, I just felt really dizzy...........

    She's an australian and she has lived in Japan for 15 years and she's 5 years older than me. The thing is that we r really compatible in terms of almost everything........cooking, watching movies, and etc etc.........But I just dont want to date her and i cant tell why..........I started to think if i really am a racist.......but i think it might be the age thing that really freaks me out.........She just really caught me out of guard....

    Now we still seeing each other every week...not like seeing each other on the class........we cooking together and sometimes dine out or grab a movie to watch..........but we havent kissed.............yet..........

    I have a feeling that she has a thing with japanese guys......and thats why she's learning japanese......i really dont understand what she had a crush on me for.......i mean....i cant speak japanese so i certainly cant help her about her japanese.......except the kanjis coz im chinese.

    So here goes my story.....i have no idea where this friendship is goin to, if u call that a "friendship"....but i kinda enjoy it so far.  Marrying a white girl.....geez.......thats still too much for me to take.....

  • Becca XIE
    Becca XIE wrote:


  • MoMo
    MoMo wrote:


  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    Well, honestly, White guys lose interest in white girls and Asian guys lose interest in white girls are not the same thing, are they????


  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    You'll be all right in beijing man, as all those chinese girls would LOVE dating caucasian guys........

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    In my opinion, this is perhaps not something you need help with, not right now anyway ... it is not like "should I take this job" or "should I study engineering", which can be analysed in a logical and rational fashion ... feelings is usually not logical and irrational, and how you feel about her now, cannot dictate how you feel about her in a few months ... if you like hanging out out with her, then just hang out, and if you dont want any romance with her, just play your part and be a friend or buddy ... just chill and be yourself ...

  • Sarawang
    Sarawang wrote:

    hehe, I  like this story. detailed and informative  for me.

  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    When the first time she brought that up, i did say "no" to her. coz it was a surprise and i was definitely not ready for a relationship. So we decided to be friends. But still, i can tell that she still likes me. Last weekend, she asked me to go over her place and cook Okonomiyaki together, which is japanese pancake. I was quite in shock when she told me she actually went to many stores just to find Aonori, which is japanese for green seaweed coz i said i like some Aonori sprinckled on okonomiyaki..............There r some other stuff like that.......

    I really think Asian girls and white girls have differernt attitudes towards marriage, i mean in general. Asian girls r more settled down once they get married while white girls r more independent, which is good but somehow it just constantly scares me.

     I always hav this scenario in my mind that one day i marry a white girl and then 3 years later, she just standing in front of me saying that " could u take care of our 3yo daughter coz im gonna travel around the world........."


  • Belle Wang
    Belle Wang wrote:

    I have to admit that western girls are more willing to express their feelings.they don't hesitate to show their love to their loved ones(family,friends,lovers..etc). They are brave girls,brave enough to pursue someone/something that worth it.

    :) Good luck!

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    Hahaha ... Doom, what flavour of ice cream is that?

    With which parallel dimension are we talking about? Because most Chinese girls I have met in Beijing (and China) over the last three years are quite "opened" these days when it comes to expressing their feelings ...

    That girl is definitely in love with you, but if you are not interested, I suggest you make sure she knows about it instead of dragging her on ... and did you mean that if she were a Chinese (or other Asian race), then you would be interested? ...

  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    @ Alex. I would love to travel around the world even after i get married. But i certainly dont want to see my wife cruising around n flirting with those chiselled chests who r 10years old younger than me while i have to raise my kid alone, if u know wat im talking about.

    @ Mr Doom. Thanks for ur reply. Laught it up as u wish, race DOES matter in this world. I was talking that with a famous australian writer last year over an academic seminar. She did agree with me and she said " its like a house. People who settled in earlier would expect the others follow the rules that they have established." So, in some degree, racism would be more related with culture other than pure race. Its just a coincidence that people with same race normally carry the similar cultural background.  Well, maybe we could throw a topic just about Race later on...........

    @叮当. I did tell her.....I surely did!!!! I think there r other issues that i care about, like our age. she's 5 years older than me. The reason that i still seeing her as a friend is that we r really compatible and this compatibility could be hard to find. Therefore i cherish it.

    No, 叮当, i wouldnt be that superficial and totally deny any possibility just because she's not Asian or not chinese. Thats insane! I think i might be just not ready for a relationship.........and a relationship plus a potential cross cutural marriage just totally gave me a heart attack..... 

  • NN
    NN wrote:

    I have seen a lot the white guys with asian girls

    but really few I have seen the white girls with asian guys ... ...

    even I have heard from somebody,that is because many of the white girls are stuck up?????

  • Mengll
    Mengll wrote:



  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    "stuck up"? That can be applied to any girl, and race or skin color has no relevance.

    Asian (men or ladies) tend to be quiet and timid, and for some western folks, that is a nice change from the openness (or out-spoken type) that they had experienced within their own town or city or country ...


  • Tian 王倚天

    Doom: What culture is your ice cream?

  • 关震
    关震 wrote:

    @ Dr Doom. Hope ur ice cream is not full-creamed....

    @Mengll. 怎么让你说得跟午夜牛郎接客是的啊。。。“这俩男的压根儿就不想接”........请问那要是接了一宿多少钱啊。。。

    @ 叮当. Yeah, thats why asian girls r popular in Australia. Men prefer women to be quiet, timid and in some cases, petit (in size) so that they could develop the instinct to protect them.

  • Mengll
    Mengll wrote:



  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    what flovour is it?

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    A few phases actually ...

    In the 70's, I loved the pineapple ice cream from Dairy Farm in Hong Kong

    In the 80's, when I came back to Hong Kong for holiday, my friends brought me some "rocky road" and that is still one of my fav

    In the 90's when I was living in Australia, started liking "rum and raisin" ...

    We had been buying "rocky road" of a foreign brand (Streets? or Pauls?) in Beijing for a while, but they seemed to stop making them last year, we tried a local brand, but it was terrible ...


  • Jessica Wow
    Jessica Wow wrote:


  • Olive Zhu
    Olive Zhu wrote:

    why it is so difficult and complicated once we face to love, please just follow the feeling. do it or not do it.

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    楼主: You don't have to think about it that much, though it's nice to know that some people still do think.

    Westerners are not usually thinking about marriage when they are dating or getting into a relationship. Our attitude is, if you enjoy your time with someone, spend time with them. When you stop enjoying it, stop doing it (of course, you should try to do new things so you keep enjoying it).

    You don't have to worry that you're going to ruin her and she won't be able to find a good husband after.

    Of course, the age difference is a huge issue if you're actually considering marriage, but I don't think it has entered your friend's mind.

  • Maria Rintala
    Maria Rintala wrote:

    When love come dont hide from it, dont matter how old bacause it just a age numbers, but id the love is just from other person, dont play with her/his feelings, tell about how you feel..because otherwise it will hurt more, even still in the end someone will always get hurt , always :( 

     And actually all peoplle are dfferent from inside dont matter where you from but all ppl have fantasy and some ppl can say and make it true, some ppl not..its just, even i am westerner but my life and my mind is really different, im wester but i do respect chinese culture and i do respect others countries aswell,.. My only problem is that no one asian person could take me seriously if i say that i only like asian and my hear belongs to asia., ..And sad ist that no one can understand me why exept one person ^^ Well dont know why i was chering this here but well its me..have a lovely day ^^

  • we serve
    we serve wrote:

    cool the debate. but let me tell you all that chinese boys like a lot white and black girl. but there are affraid just for the reaction of they environment, the same thing with they girl. as the man is the holder of name of the family it is a duty for him to do his best for the best regard of his family. but the women is considered as living the family.

    but when they get out of they country they express themselve man and women. in my country they are a lot of chinese man out with white and black. but they girls like black BIT

  • 巴特
    巴特 wrote:

    I wont come back to read your comments again probably.. so here is a joke for you... they say that in heaven, you will get japanese wife, chinese food and american salary, while in hell, you gonna get chinese salary, japanese food and american wife.

  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:

    I'll throw some gas on the fire:

    In hell, I'd expect to receive a Bangladeshi salary, British food and a Russian mail order bride.

  • Clark
    Clark wrote:

    really intersting story, discussion and jokes, wl be back again. :)

  • Webslave
    Webslave wrote:

    hm, why thinking about marriage if you even havent kissed yet? Anyway, i dont think that race matters at all, but culture and attitude matter a lot indeed. I have been through relationships with "white girls", it wouldnt differ much if they were "yellow", i just ended up to find out that i feel more attracted to asian girls (black hair and darker skin) :p but what really had more impact was the background culture. I think asians are generally more social aware than individual and indipence oriented white ppl.

    what ever, just enjoy the time with her and let it go with the natural flow, dont think too much, that would ruin the moment.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    Hahahahaha ... I must applaud for your effort to dig this out ... but, I am curious, ...

    let's share our happiness and forget sorrow

    What is this?

  • Saint - Spartacus

    如果想方设法结交外国人,你怎样都可以结交到。 如果随缘,那你这辈子也没有机会。 这就是交集的概念喔 !

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)



  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)



  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)



  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)



  • Ajantha Manohar

    关震, You feel your soft masculinity threat by her western manners. Your 阳 is not enough to date a western woman without feel you are a pussy. Don´t worry, I understand you, chinese 撒娇 makes your 阳 look bigger, and it feels so good.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    Hahahahaha ... not sure why, but I was suddenly thinking about a cheese sandwich ...

  • Simen Wangberg

    "But my dislikes about white girls are they can be too trashy and less elegant when compared to Chinese girls."

    Trying to remember the last time I saw a white woman squat or spit in public...I see "elegant" Chinese women do this on a regular basis.

    5,000 years of sophistication, mmhm.

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