Discussion » Food & Drink » Top 10 Rules of Boozing

  • A.w
    A.w wrote:
    <p><img src="http://www.sexcigarsbooze.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Top-10-Rules-of-Boozing.jpg" alt="" width="455" height="481" /></p> <p>Son, never trust a man who doesn&rsquo;t drink because he&rsquo;s probably a self-righteous sort, a man who thinks he knows right from wrong all the time. Some of them are good men, but in the name of goodness, they cause most of the suffering in the world. They&rsquo;re the judges, the meddlers. And, son, never trust a man who drinks but refuses to get drunk. They&rsquo;re usually afraid of something deep down inside, either that they&rsquo;re a coward or a fool or mean and violent. You can&rsquo;t trust a man who&rsquo;s afraid of himself. But sometimes, son, you can trust a man who occasionally kneels before a toilet. The chances are that he is learning something about humility and his natural human foolishness, about how to survive himself. It&rsquo;s damned hard for a man to take himself too seriously when he&rsquo;s heaving his guts into a dirty toilet bowl.</p> <p><br /> ~James Arthur Crumley (October 12, 1939 &ndash; September 17, 2008)<br /> <em>The Wrong Case</em> (1975)</p>
  • Jenny&King
    Jenny&King wrote:

    According to the James Arthur Crumley top ten tules ....guess i am a good man now....~

  • High Priest
    High Priest wrote:

    Frank Sinatra said, "Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy." Well, the Irish certainly love their drink. Is it any wonder then that even their coffee has alcohol? 

    Ed McMahon
    God invented whiskey to keep the Irish from ruling the world.


  • Jenny&King
    Jenny&King wrote:

    。。。I am not an angel。。。。。。

  • Father Of Boring

    "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." —Benjamin Franklin

    "There can't be good living where there is not good drinking." —Benjamin Franklin

    "Who does not love beer, wine, women and song remains a fool his whole life long." —Carl Worner

  • Father Of Boring

    "Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking." —Dave Barry

    "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." —Dave Barry

    "Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer." —Dave Barry

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs." —David Daye

  • Father Of Boring

    "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " —Dean Martin

    "You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." —Dean Martin

  • Father Of Boring

    "The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues." —Elizabeth Taylor

  • Father Of Boring

    "Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut." —Ernest Hemingway

    "An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools." —Ernest Hemingway

    "Why don't we all just get a long-neck?" —Hank Williams, Jr.

    "My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle." —Henny Youngman

    "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." —Henny Youngman

     "That man is the richest whose pleasures are the cheapest." —Henry David Thoreau

    "The wine urges me on, the bewitching wine, which sets even a wise man to singing and to laughing gently and rouses him up to dance and brings forth words which were better unspoken." —Homer

    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind." —Humphrey Bogart

    "A bar is better than a newspaper for public discussion." —Jim Parker

    "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world." —Kaiser Wilhelm

    "Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody." —Mark Twain

    "The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass." —Martin Mull

    "Work is the curse of the drinking classes." —Oscar Wilde

    "The sum of the matter is, the people drink because they wish to drink." —Rudolph Brand

    "I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake--which I also keep handy." —W. C. Fields

    "Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water." —W. C. Fields

    "A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her." —W.C. Fields

    "What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? " —W.C. Fields

    "Everybody has to believe in something...I believe I'll have another drink." —W.C. Fields

    "Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me." —Winston Churchill

    "You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred." —Woody Allen

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    FOB seems to have all the right heroes here...

    He who makes a beast of himseld gets rid of the pain of being a man.- Samuel Johnson

    "I GOT ME THREE BEERS 'N A FIST FULLA DOWNS,
    AN' I'M GONNA GET WRECKED, SO FUCK YOU CLOWNS!" Frank Zappa

     

    “Claret is the liquor for boys; port for men; but he who aspires to be a hero must drink brandy.”
    Samuel Johnson

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    sorry about that am abit pishjed

  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:

    Being "high" on life ought to be illegal.

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    law breakers here~~~~~~~had  maybe 60 shots of brandy, red wine, champagne and long islands last night, totally wasted and lights out, thus i got such a heavy hangover today o...............o

  • Father Of Boring

    @Ataa - You know the cure for that!  MO4R.

    @Pear Blossom - I know so many quotes about booze because I've quit drinking so many times.  Your name reminds me of a girl I used to know whose name was actually Pear.  

    @High on life - It's chemicals all the way down.  I'm stoned as fuck on fatigue and wrist pain.  

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    father of boring~~~~~~~~~im now on treatment lol

  • Father Of Boring

    Dare I ask what kind?  I think I might just give up on work and go ahead and start treating myself.

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    brandy: asbach uralt,clear creek,raynal

    wine:there're very fine ones~~~~~~~~~

    cham:pink,martini & rossi prosecco........

    it's some princess' bday, some rich guy buying~~~~~~~~imagiing

  • Father Of Boring

    @Pear Blossom - The name's about the only thing I remember.

    @Ata - Daaaaaamn...Good imagination.  I love parties like that.  Invite me...IN YOUR MIND.

    @Astaroth - The firewater, she is not a kind mistress.  I'm a much more reserved drinker than I pretend to be.  If you see me out with a whiskey and coke, chances are it's actually just the latter.  My rule is, I'll buy you a drink, and I'll let you buy me drinks, but I almost never buy for myself.  

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    we have this thing often, ill invite you in my mind always since now on~~~~~~~~i always drink amout of tomato juice after drinks, to clean up~~~~~~~~~im sure alcohol wont kill me~~~~~~~~~~nothing kills ppl but ppls self-control

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    Actually think the Crumley quote is a bit of exquisite prose, and I have friends who I'm fairly certain will die of liver dsease...

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    @ carlos

    if they do, what will you write on their gravestones?

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    His name's Ben, and it will probably be something about beer, hookers and Beavis and Butthead- three of his great loves (and mine to a lesser degree), family allowing, of course.

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    if i die of alcohol, i'm gonna require my gravestone to be wine bottle shaped with "Epitaph" on the trade mark position~~~~~~~~~

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    good call Ataahua, go for a bottle of Maotai to keep it regional...

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    moments ago got informed maotai n wuliangye had a terrible price rise lately, i probably should buy some to save now~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    Yes Maotai, Gold, and US Treasury Bonds are apparently where the hipsters are at these days (and Fangjia)...

  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    Yes Maotai, Gold, and US Treasury Bonds are apparently where the hipsters are at these days (and Fangjia)...

  • Ataahua
    Ataahua wrote:

    havent tried any chinese spirit for over 2 yrs~~~~~~maotai's trade mark sucks, doesnt deserve to be on my gravestone

  • Checkered
    Checkered wrote:

    Don't drink, I smoke and I pay cig taxes.

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