By: Fetiche Antoinette
People may not realize how hard it is so be in sex work. And no, I don’t mean the penises flying out of boxers without a seconds notice or getting cancelled on or the various weird smells and fluids that can occur. It’s hard (accidental pun I swear) because of the non-BDSM people.
Everyone thinks you’re a freak/prostitute/sad person or does the wow-how-interesting-smile-but-on-the-inside-I’m-judging-your-parents-for-low-quality-care thing. And frankly who wants to get into a semi-defensive explanation of their true self every time you meet someone at a bar or are introduced to friends of your friends as “that girl I told you about”.
Obviously I could just lie but what a waste of everyone’s time. I recently had “the truth will set you free” tattooed on my left arm - I am honest to the core despite how frequently the truth fucks us all (and never pays. Rude.). One of the hardest things is dating. Not only does someone have to accept that I do S&M related activities with people for money, they also have to accept that I will want to do said activities with them in private. And not everyone is cool with that.
I tried internet dating for months but that didn’t go so well. I mean what is a man supposed to do when he sees my profile? Hmm…cute blonde…likes kids…can’t live without Instant Watch on Netflix….dominatrix…and sold. I have been on so many dates that just ended with me telling stories about ‘the weirdest shit I’ve ever done’ and guys trying to sleep with me or grope me after lukewarm conversation. It’s much worse when I actually start dating someone and after a few weeks realize it’s been about sex and nothing else. That makes me feel more like a whore than any client ever has.
The truth about me is I have a very high IQ and I’m a talented artist. But you know. Also carry a whip in my purse. If you ever meet a sex worker do me a favor: ask her about something not related to sex. Like her favorite ice cream flavor (Half-Baked) or her opinion about the Asian market crash (it’s bad). Because c’mon. Who wants to take about their job after work?