Discussion » Nonsense » how to forgive others?

  • Sandrine
    Sandrine wrote:
    <p>guys,</p> <p>i find myself completely lost in the anger...I've been torturing myself for almost two years for not letting go the harms somebody has caused me.</p> <p>how can i find a way to forgive him and set myself free?</p>
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahaha ... if it has already been two years, I doubt if there is anything or anyone to confront ...

    To forgive someone, it takes time for you to change your mindset ... without knowing much about your story, I can only say that you must have been hurt very badly to have not forgiven this person after two years ...

    My suggestion therefore ... dont let the memory and the pain take over your life, instead, remember it as a lesson, use it as your motivation ...

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    。。。

    (continued) ...

    Remember that we always have choices, and most people tend to choose the one that can make them happy ...

    ... in your case ... you chose to stay with him despite of what he did, but at the same time, you are not happy with him about what happened, that sounds like a contradiction or conflict to me ...

    I dont believe that you cannot loose him in your life... but ... if that is ineed how you feel, then at least you can choose to live a happier life ... if you cannot forgive, maybe you should go straight to forget ... and maybe, only maybe, the two of you can have a happier life ...

     

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    。。。

    (continued) ... trust me, you are not "alone", there are many girls, as well as guys, hanging onto a bad relationship, each with his/her own reason ...

    Perhaps try to think about it another way ...

    Imagine, you had a bad car accident two years ago ... the car was badly damaged, however, it still runs ... and for whatever reason, instead of getting rid of it, you hang onto it, although it keeps bringing back the bad memory two years ago ...

    So ... loose it, once and for all ... or drive it, but dont think too much about it?

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    (continued) ... heehee ... in that case, be careful which cab you got onto :)

    ... good night ...

  • Ms. Stephanie
    Ms. Stephanie wrote:

    You might just need a sorry from him, or let him go if what he did seriously hurting you ..  

  • High Priest
    High Priest wrote:

    Let by gones be bygones. U've got to forgive yourself also. There's not future without forgiveness.

    High Priest

  • Winnie
    Winnie wrote:

    two years...my suggestions, just stay away from him. dont think about talking to him again or being friends...that's torturing by itself. just be glad that whatever he put you through is done! so dont carry it on. if u still think about to sort things out with him, it's too risky, you might end up getting hurt again. not worth it. 

    whoever that can hurt you so bad doesnt deserve a second chance. move on. suround yourself with some friends. that'd always help.

  • Winnie
    Winnie wrote:

    one more thing, it's important for you to stay with friends who are loving and caring, not angry people. you have anger in yourself already... in times like this, it's so easy to get on the wrong way and become someone that's cynical.

    Sandrine, you are so young and you have such a future before you....i hope you can see that

  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:

    I forget.

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