Discussion » Dating & Romance » Should I tell him its over?

  • Coco
    Coco wrote:
    <p>I've been in this relationship for more than five years but from the look of things it seems that we dont really need each other or maybe I dont need him anymore.</p> <p>Lately, I've been seeing another man who seems to be more serious about relationship; The truth is that I am not getting younger anymore and my mom&nbsp;want to see her&nbsp;grandchild before she go.</p> <p>But as I am writing this article, I really do not have the mind to hurt him yet I cant continue to love a boy who's not ready for responsibility.</p> <p>Should I tell him its over or tell him I'm inlove with another man or just disappear?</p>
  • Pavoir Sponse
    Pavoir Sponse wrote:

    You would seriously consider going out with someone for five years and then just disappear?

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahahaha ... Coco ... could you perhaps disclose and share with us, what did you mean by "we dont really need each other"? Since "love" does not really count as a "need" (off topic), so my guess is either sex or money? Sorry to be so bold ...

  • Bobo
    Bobo wrote:

    you also have to know on fornt of you is maybe 40-50 years you have to spend with him , so you can keep that?

    if you really dont want share life with him or feel boring with him ,just let him know what is the problem. see what he will going to do .

    if he improve and really care the relationship with you ,i think you should give him the chance .

    if he also dont care and tired to hold this , then i think you better to choice the new life .

    5 years compare all life is nothing

  • Ejdnzlaj
    Ejdnzlaj wrote:

    You already know the answer: yes. You don't want to be with him, so why waste your time with him?

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    I don't believe I've ever called someone a bitch on this website before. DD, maybe you can recall an instance?

    Coco, you are a bitch. Do your boyfriend a favor and tell him you're not faithful.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahaha ... 莫明 ... if you had, it would have been w worthwhile reason ...

  • Kent Bekkavik
    Kent Bekkavik wrote:

    HAHA for baby seal lovers it's saner to roll a snowman during spring time and grant HIM respect for responsibility.

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    "him since he is not ready for responsibility."

    I would opine that LZ is the one who's not ready for responsibility...

    If you don't want to be in a relationship, end the relationship. Don't start a new relationship and then claim that the other person wasn't responsible enough.

  • Nadia Scheie
    Nadia Scheie wrote:

    。。。。。。。。。。。

    you sure about how your bf thinking about you 2 relationship??

    he might be just doesnt wanna hurt u too~~its make clear y he doesnt propose

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahahahaha... dare I say, this is perhaps the most "united" I have ever seen in any thread ... go team ...

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    How about some maturity from someone who's old enough to get married?

    "Honey, I'm 26 and I'm starting to feel older. I'm concerned that in a few years I won't be physically attractive to men. I don't have a lot of money, and I want to give up my career and have a baby, so I think I need to find a man who will marry me so that he will legally be forced to support me and the baby, even if he's not attracted to me any more and wants to break up. We have been together for many years, and we know eachother well enough. Do you want to marry me? Otherwise, I need to end this relationship so I can find someone who does."

    Maybe I'm just jealous because I passed up on a few hot girls in my last long term relationship, but people who aren't capable of ending the relationship before finding a replacement probably shouldn't be claiming issues of responsibility.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahaha ... El Iblis ... that was a different case ...

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    (continued)

    Coco ... you have made it too easy for most (or all) to be united in this case ...

    It is not like others who ran into an issue with their relationship, and asked for help ... even that recent case, someone asked whether a girl should lend money to her BF out of love ... it was a discuss-able thread ...

    Your case is simpler ... you have fallen out of love (or nearly?) and want to move on, and asking whether you should ... using an analogy:

    I have grown out of my dress, should I buy a new one? There is really no reason not to ...

  • Yuki
    Yuki wrote:

    Dear Coco,

    A person who is healthy or not  cant not judge from outside (Body), also inside ( I mean brain)

    After i read your thread, i have found out that i am also going to be 26 this december, i have 6 years relationships with boyfriend.

    1, For the marriage, I am not in  hurry, cause i know my boyfriend loves me and i trust him so much! ( Trust )

    2, For the baby, I am not in hurry too. why? Think about when is the best age for a women? 20-30 right? If i have a baby during i am 20 yrs old, then i have to spend my best time to take care of the baby instead of enjoying my life, isnt it a pity? i prefer to spend my best time and age enjoying my life with my bf and friends and have a baby when me and my bf both ready to have it, no hurry!  

    3, Responsibity,  is for both women and men, we all equal! we all need to make money, being stable, then have a baby!

    4, Enjoying life,  doesnt mean meet with a hot guy and then have one night stand, thats is worst thing you do if you are in a relationship. Enjoy life means do things which is worthful, for example, go to gym after you get out from your work, go to travel to explor the world when you are on holiday, go out with friends when you feel you wanna talk to people and wanna be more sociable, you also can try to be slutty when you with your bf to have a romantic evening...everything helps you when you are in relationship....

    5,  I have read a news once, which said a person can live longer and healthier when they feel they are younger than their real age....

    Coco, Dont push, enjoy your life, be happy and you are young! :)

     

     

  • Tina
    Tina's猫 wrote:

    there are many problems during a relationship as well as marriage,i suggest you should consider this cautiously , will u regret after breakup?it's five year relationship,you 2 must have developed a particular bond with each other,it's quite special and beautiful for a relationship.

    will u just just end it because ur mom expects u to get married?how do u think,do u want to get married or are u ready?if so,at least ur bf has the right to know what's going on in ur mind,tell him,if he is not ready with it,then considering another relationship!and i think this is why u said "you don't need him" above.

    and,another question,u think this new guy is responsible,but is he looking for a marriage too? this is really not a game,it could easily get ppl hurt and especially yourself too.

    think think@_@

     

     

  • Tina
    Tina's猫 wrote:

    seems wlib is quietly growing into a relationship solution website,maybe the creator should consider applying for a patent or make it exclusive,and here is my suggestion for the name"allaboutrelationship" lolllllllllll

  • Shane
    Shane wrote:

    One of my major questions is: How long have you been living off of his money? And how much more money does the new guy have to make him deemed "responsible"?

  • Shane
    Shane wrote:

    Seriously, this shit really gets me. Its a wonder there arent more suicides in this country with women looking at guys like they are picking investment plans.

  • High Priest
    High Priest wrote:

    Well, in times like these, we need God, and on this site,God Speaks through His ordained servants like I and Reverend Dando. Thanks Bedtyger and Godfather:)

    Coco, most people here have given wise admonitions and u need to really think carefully. A new guy might show a good side, but u really don't know him. Sometimes in life, it's better to deal with a devol u know than with an angel you really don't know.  If you told us that ur current bf has cheated on u many time like Godfather and Bedtyger, Mr Incredible and do, we would tell you to make another move. But from your previous ad, it's obvious you are the one who cheated on this guy, you were debating on whether sleeping with him on the first day...

    Wake up girl! From the first date this new guy was already asking you to play bedminton, it shows that this guy likes more of ur sex than what you are aiming for__Responsibility, a responsible guy won't do that on the first place...Now u like the way he throws the shuttlecock and u think he will marry and stand by you, think twice.

    May God bless you Coco.

    High Priest

  • Micky
    Micky wrote:

    You really have a way of getting people involved. More grease to your elbows.

    Meanwhile,.. Tell him the situation cuz if your mind is off the hook, seems to me there's nothing more to do. But hey man, five years is long enough for you to decide if she's miss right or miss wrong.

  • High Priest
    High Priest wrote:

    Let us not crucify Coco, it's normal for her somehow to come this crosswalk. What she is doing is better than dirvoce, it's better to end things now than once she is married. But, she has got a dilemma here, and we hope we can help her make a right decision. It might happen to u too.

     

    High Priest

  • High Priest
    High Priest wrote:

    @...., Did you share the same  bed with ur progenitor?

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahahaha ... so there is in fact a story behind a story?

    It would seem that you have been "dating", or in a relationship, with a guy who had not been totally dependable, and perhaps have a few "extras" on the side, for fun, among other things?

    Well, if he is NOT serious about you, then you should move on ... whether there is another person, is not the point here ...

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    Coco, "dating" doesn't mean he is your boyfriend in English. You date until you decide that you are in a commited relationship, and then he is your boyfriend.  Our understanding is that you have had a boyfriend for five years, and are dating another guy because you are a bitch.

    If in fact you have only been dating a guy for five years, and he is dating other girls as well, then I retract my statement that you are a bitch, with my apologies. Otherwise, the ruling stands.

    Those of us who aren't peasants from the China of our grandparents time have relationships because we enjoy spending time with the other person. If you would prefer to sell your body to the highest bidder, I understand that tradition exists and you are free to follow it. It is disgusting to do it while under the pretense of maintaining a relationship with another man though.

    Fortunately, it seems that you're selfish enough to be committed to breaking up with your boyfriend. Good for him!

  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:

    @Godfather, I was on a plane. And while I personally can't stand misogyny, slut-shaming, or sexism, I don't think there's a woman here who needs defending; just some girl who doesn't know what she wants.

  • Kent Bekkavik
    Kent Bekkavik wrote:

    MM, shut up, baby seals are under pressure. We love 'em, we're heartfelt people!

  • Anne-Line Søderholm

    I guess the original post needs to be tweaked:

    "I've been with a guy for five years; i met another guy who got an apartment and drives a car. So; how should i dump the first one?"

    BTW; I paid 600K for my car; got a nice place as well; have my own business for 10 years; do you think I'm responsible enough for you?

  • Xiao
    Xiao wrote:

    Is his not being ready to take responsibilites or your not needing him no more the real problem in this case?

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