JZ had an American girlfriend once - Candy O'Hara.
Oh sweet, sweet Candy! One day she pressed his tiny round Chinese head to her enormous globular bosoms and nearly suffocated the poor boy. When he came to he packed his bags and left. "But JZ!!" She called from the doorway. "Who'll pluck my leg hairs now?" "Quite frankly my dear," he deadpanned "I don't give two craps!" Ever the poet.
So we see, the path of true love - like Candy's thighs - never runs smooth.