Discussion » Dating & Romance » Love bcoz he is NICE or he is ur MATCH

  • Chaton Du Nounours
    Chaton Du Nounours wrote:

    A question :

    The one u love or like, u love or like him/her, bcoz u think him/her is nice or bcoz u feel him/her is right to you ? if both r the reasons, which comes first ? more?

    看懂中文的尽量看中文,我总觉得我的poor英文不能完全准确表达我的想法……

    你爱或者喜欢ta,是因为你觉得ta好,还是因为你觉得ta跟你很合适?两者都有的话,哪个比较多?

  • Synne Syverstad

    I m very curious about this now~!

    looking for answers~

    if ur stories have past, I mean u r talking about the one u "loved" or "liked", plz also tell me the ending of ur story~

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:

    我和“适合我的她”的时间比和单喜欢的她的时间长多了。当然都是喜欢的。

    我还活着,所以故事还没有结局,但是好像还没找到最适合我的。

  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:

    Nice is boring. A nice 50/50 mix of fighting and fucking is a helluva lot more interesting.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Love grows in different ways for different people ... some might be physical, some might be financial (wow) while some might be sexual (god forbids) ... and there are those who seeded their love based on growing understanding ...

    Just because you are attracted to someone, or even love that person, it does not mean that you can have a relationship with that person ...

    The other way to say that is, whatever looks nice from afar, might not be all that attractive in close distance ... being together is about communication and making compromise, usually done out of love ... and if there is no communication, the relationship cannot survive on love alone ...

     

     

  • Simen Stensvoll

    首先他得是一个人品比较好的人,然后对我nice,这是建立关系的基础

    这种关系能不能长期和谐发展,关键还是看2个人的性格、态度,人生观、价值观等是否一样

    综上,后者多一些

  • Simen Stensvoll

    叮当黍黍说到点子上了

    being together is about communication and making compromise

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    哈哈..."比较好的人"?...这一点很值得商议...突然想到刘德华的"天若有情"...

    补充一点...沟通和牺牲(付出),绝对不能是单方面的,这样的话,一般来说关系是很难维持的...

    但另一方面,也永远不可以有"收支平衡"这种想法...要是说"爱",却又斤斤计较对方给你多少,或将来还要付出多少,这样的关系也是很难继续的...

  • .
    . wrote:

    I believe understanding each other is very very important. In other words, I will fall in love with someone who can see though me and still appreciate who I am. Of course, first of all that person has to be cute and smart :) Otherwise I won't even have interest to let him get close to me.  

    Again, totally agree with 叔叔. Communication and making compromise are the keys to a successful relationship. 

  • .
    . wrote:

    楼主美女, 其实好人(男/女)很多的,仅仅是觉得人好,我认为并不能成为维持两个人在一起的理由。我前任曾在我们分开后跟一个我们共同的朋友说,他相信他可能这辈子都找不到像我这么好的人,但是他还是觉得爱情没有了,无法在一起相处。

    从我的经验来看,我如果爱上一个人,会欣赏他的好,理解并疼惜他的不好,会心甘情愿为他付出而不计较得失,会为他的快乐而快乐,会想要把一切都在第一时间和他分享,会因为他而有动力让自己变得更好。至于为什么会爱上,像我上面说的,很重要的一点是两个人能沟通,能彼此懂得并且互相欣赏。或者你所说的两个人match就是这个意思吧?

  • Saina
    Saina wrote:

    Usually, when I say " U r a nice person", it would be followed by " but maybe we are not suitable for each other"....

     

     

  • Monica Jakobsen

    I i just get this right or not feeling towards a girl when i 1st meet them, but this feeling dont come offten. most of the time is because i like the girl's personaility and ofcourse her pretty face. haha

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    First of all, how come the text in the "editing box" had shrunk (when editing), and why is the line spacing so much "wider" now?

    In my own case, as I have told Sparky before, though with less details...

    We started with (cold) mutual respect and admiration, no immediate feeling of any love (or lust) yet ... then we found out the various good and bad about each other as we dated, and as we got closer, we made some attempts to convince each other to change, based on what is the ideal in our own minds ... then we fought about whether the other was correct about such ideal (hahaha, that was fun) ... we eventually made some small adjustments and decided to settle down and I proposed to her at my b-day dinner in 2003 and got married in July :)

    I dont often tell her about my past GF, but she knows that she is not the one I love most, on the other hand, she knows that she is the one I want to spend my life with ... the other night, we were having dinner after work, and this old (western) couple at the next table were ordering from the menu, and we joked about whether we could survive each other to live that long ...

    Like I might have hinted before, for me anyway, "love" should not be just about (instant) attraction nor is it some kind of conquer or "ownership" ... "love" grows from a need, a (abstract) void that needs to filled, but such void is different for each individual, therefore I believe that there can only be certain individual (or a very small number) that can fill your own void, i.e. be careful using the word "love", and be even more careful when that person in your life says "love" to MANY people  :)

    It's her b-day today, going to get some flowers and things now, shhh, dont tell her, ok?

     

  • Synne Syverstad
    hmm, I guess it is my time to say sth... according to my and my friends' experience, I think the best situation is the two reasons exist at the same time and "match" is the more important one~ like the song goes“有些人不知哪里好,可就是谁都替代不了”(there is someone u dont know what makes him so special to make him irreplaceable)~ this is kind of feeling beyond words is the most steady base of the relationship~ u can meet so many nice ones, but few right ones~ "east west home is best". why? as home is urs. only the one make u feel he or she can be urs can make u wanna settle down~ but appreciation Is also so important~ everyone need to be appreciated, esp, by the ones they care about~ girls need her BF say "u r beautiful". men need their GF be proud of them~
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Been watching this movie called "How to Make Love to a Woman" (not too funny, in fact quite serious and boring), and I think some of you might be interested in this dialog between the character "Lauren" and her mother:

    Daughter: hey mom, why did you and dad split up?

    Mother: because I kicked his lazy ass out, that's why

    Daughter: yeah, but why

    Mother: I guess I just wasnt sure that I was in love with him anymore ... and he was lazy

    Daughter: what made you changed your mind?

    Mother: I found out that I couldn't live without him

    Daughter: b'cos he's the one?

    Mother: no (pause) because I love him ...

    Mother: relationships go through all kinds of peaks and valleys, Lauren, and there's no "one", unless you are counting the one in the back of your imagination

    Mother: here's what I think, I think you'd find the right person that you want to build the life with, and then you made that person perfect one for you

    (Lauren's dad crashed his lawn mower into a tree)

    Mother: you'd try real hard

     

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    1 April 2002 ... my happiest April Fool's Day :)

  • Nadia Scheie
    Nadia Scheie wrote:
    I was crushing on him....but as it is a crush on~so it s also my secret~ i'll keep my secret till one day i know his get in a relationship,then I'll just try to forget him~~though i know its not easy~~poor me~
  • Kristian Svoren

    hehehe... now i know the secret of some sheaths ? funny~!!!!!

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