Discussion » Dating & Romance » when is saying "I love you " to soon or too late?

  • Victoria Falls
    Victoria Falls wrote:
    when is the right time to say"I LOVE YOU", to someone you dating? when is it too soon? too late? overdue? Does culture play a role? or an individual's up bringing?
    i am hearing to many "i love you's" being thrown around. like its a new way of saying, i like you/i dig your style/i have a massive crush on you
  • pommie
    pommie wrote:
    Victoria, there's something I've been meaning to tell you...
  • pommie
    pommie wrote:
    ??

    I wanted to mention your spelling mistake. Should be "too many" not "to many".

    :P
  • xxxxxxxx
    xxxxxxxx wrote:
    It is too early to say "I love you" on the first date, obviously...lol

    What I think though is that there is no single answer to all those questions, it all depends on the individuals involved, and their emotion, some people fall in love faster/sooner than others.Either way, saying it the first two weeks is definitely soon, because you barely know the person, you don't know what they like or hate, what are their habits, are they annoying or not and blah blah blah. Give it a couple months.

    Late according to what?, its not like you are racing with someone else.

    Does culture play a role?, Yes, I think (I am not generalizing), Chinese tend to say it sooner, I had this girl who said it the first day we met (true story), it freaked me out..lol. Some people also confuse Love and Lust, since there is fine line between those two, and what I think is, what we feel the first few weeks is Lust as opposed to Love, When we lust for someone, we only like one particular side of the person mostly the appearance, whereas Love goes beyond the appearance.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    I guess.. whenever you feel that you love the other person? As long as that's not until after you've spent a substantial enough time in bed together, otherwise it's just lust not love right?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    This is a general topic about love. Love is so big a topic that you can not run to the end here. Be specific about which kind of loving because they are so so many types. To be exact, even when you are dating someone, there are some types of love that come to work. Let me get a drink first. I am coming back with the types that we need to look at. Keep around.
  • Børge Notkevich
    Any words can be thrown around, but it's the action that matters. Some people are not good with words, but they'll act upon things that matters to them.
  • Xiao
    Xiao wrote:
    Well, you say it when you truly have THE feeling and you really mean it. Otherwise it's gonna be awkward.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... it is this "throwing around" thing that had given all the men, esp foreign men, a bad name ... let's not start that one now though ...

    Dont use "I love you" like "hello" ... a lot of people do that and similar to Victoria said, it has lost its meaning ...

    Even Chinese have adopted that now ... it is on many guestbooks in WLIB ... though there is a "like" and then there is a "love" ...

    Xiao said "awkward" ... heehee ... why would you feel "awkward" to say " I love you" when you dont have true feeling nor dont mean it? I dont understand that ... because I am sure a lot of people are doing it for whatever reason ...

    Anyway ... to that, I would say ... if you only want the other person know, but dont care if he/she loves you, then there is nothing awkward about it ... otherwise, it can really be exbarassing or ... "awkward" ...

  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    The fact i have come up with, scientifically proven from the cool laboratories, is that we really think when to say "I love you" The emotions we have at the time dictate. So here even if we discuss 100 times, i am sure yesterday someone one this very site said it as soon as she/ he met someone.
  • NN
    NN wrote:

    So the story I heard recently is:

    The guy dated that girl and then they fucked when 1st time they met.Something came in a suddent and surprised the guy is,she said I LOVE YOU when they done sex.

    The next morning,he dumped her.

     

    Such a bastard he is and douchebag she is ... ...

  • Nathaniel Boyle
    i think love is 2 subjective anyway, the right time to "say" i love you? actually i dont think it needs to be said, love is in actions, the way you treat someone, care for them etc i think there is no right time to say i love you, just love them and they will know it
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
  • .
    . wrote:

    For me, when is the right time to say I love you is not a problem. My question is, if you say it too many times (more than once a day for example), will he/ she still value it the same way? I am like an idiot when it comes to tricks in a relationship...

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