Discussion » Nonsense » Male on Sale (Limited Offer!)

  • №❶ Passioη
    №❶ Passioη wrote:
    "Male Whores"? what you've been hoping for is true. Don't ask me if I work in that industry but I can tell you it's lucrative. You females came to look for males. let's get the story straight for once... to make things easier for you, the males we have in stock, you can either enter the open auction them openly, or buy them from me at a lower price (limited offer)...

    1. Astaroth (RMB 4.00) - will keep you laughing but straight forward to you, a bit snobbish but catching up quick with the 21st century

    2. Alban Raysse (RMB 5.50) - A complicated personality but serious about "Love"

    3. Dando Z (RMB 0.05) - extremely prude, pretentious but nice, treat you like an egg till you feel you're in a relationship with another female. However, he's awkwardly impatient, hardened and childish sometimes.

    4. Jon Gu (RMB 15.00) - will be thoughtful, guide you properly but leave room for you to make mistakes which hurt him, and you might hate him for not having concrete male principles. forget that part

    5. Pete (RMB 9.00) not the asshole pete - a perfect BF, knows when to hold you close and when to give you space. Passive about certain things but a strong figure when he needs to be

    6. Throstan fries (RMB 1.00 ) - in his worthless arrogance, u'll need to wear a lot of make up (and look like a ghost) to get him looking in your face for more than 3 seconds. + in whatever you do to impress him, Don't do pole dance.

    7. Matt (RMB 150.00) - he will treat you like a princess (especially if you're american), he will not fail to send you sweet words all the time. but get tired of you sooner than later.

    8. Kodi (RMB 16.00) Responsible, honest and caring. but simply prefers to keep some things private. Hey, "PRIVATE" means "Private".

    9. Matthew Abasai (RMB 5.00) - nice, Sensitive, with a heart of true love. Inwardly very attractive with a deeper understanding of humanity. however, he has a bit more to learn about "females" and "cultures".

    10. 莫明 (RMB 13.50) - Sensible, sometimes secretive and shy but keeps a masculine look and chooses his words carefully. If you like Justin Timberlake, you will like this male.

    11. Poetry Passion (RMB 1.00) - NOT a nice guy, Not available yet, extremely hard to get (Limited Edition)

    12. Daniel Godfrey (RMB 0.05) - snobby and classy, a bit old fashioned mindset but brilliant for his kind, has a logical perception of love which does not fit with most females' clumsiness about love - but he's a fast learner though.

    13. Saibo (RMB 17.00) - extremely funny, easy going, a nice person to spend time with. when he gets cold, can be silent, weird and seemingly unnatural

    14. Vincent (RMB 9.00) - Intelligent and thoughtful, can also be tough - a good balance of 2 sides. Sometimes silly though.

    Other males in stock but not listed will be delivered in private order.

    No warranty. Remember this is china. However, the floor is open for negotiations :) If you're a rich female, you can pay more. none of them will leave you for their exes at least for the first month. Guaranteed! Now, Choose thy perfect male or order for customised one ;)
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    *Note that items #4, 8, and 9 might carry an additional shipping fee due to the over-sized packing fees the post office may charge. #11 and 13 are available with free shipping.
  • №❶ Passioη
    hehe, that's right... CIF and FOB prices available in Jon Gu's department ... but all taxes must be paid to me ...
  • Matt
    Matt wrote:
    oh, i'm the most expensive, which means i won't be bought right? :-D
  • №❶ Passioη
    it means you're the most valuable - Selling you to female would be good business ;)

    would you like to be cheaper?
  • Daniel
    Daniel wrote:
    Cheap and easy...Cheers for that!
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Do you sell them to shemales as well? There might be some shemales here.
  • 事与愿违
    事与愿违 wrote:
    haha..............titter
    some guys are so cheap,less than one yuan,lol~~~
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Made in China, Guangzhou.
  • 外交猫
    外交猫 wrote:
    This is China though, so now that we know the available models all the girls on WLIB can just get cheap counterfeit knock-offs for much cheaper prices. Anyone on here that's more than 5 rmb can assume they'll be replaced by a identical cheaper version.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    hahhahaa, CLONED?
  • Børge Notkevich
    haha this is awesome! Why isn't 叮当叔叔for sale?
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Yeah, come on I paid RMB 40 to get a good evaluation here, I need at least 3 clients to get some ROI!!!!
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Angela Wang
    Some of the men in here are precious relics that are kept intact and not for sale because the market is now bad. There is price fluctuations and a lot of inflation. The market is full of customer segmentation and there is no product differentiation. Suppliers and buyers have great power in determining the market at the moment. When everything is fine, many will go on market. At the moment, due to the above, you are given product from Guangzhou.

    Original products are yet to come on market.
  • Børge Notkevich
    COOL: so are all these AA products? haha. Perhaps a private sale is needed for the 'precious relics'?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    You can see the the first catch phrase is "Male whores" So they are ready to sell to you either front or behind so long as you have the dime.
  • Børge Notkevich
    haha, and some of them already agreed! perhaps next auction should be male escorts :D
  • silje helene stein
    nice post.... LOL
  • Rebecca Arnesen
    how much for Sun? 五毛?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Which side are you buying of Gu? Front bonnet or rare boot?
  • Erik Aleksander Aas
    @Jon Gu
    Which package are you referring to? Classic.
  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:
    Still trying to pin me with a label that will stick, huh big guy?

    I'm a prude now? Man it's frustrating when people don't appreciate my thinly veiled references to sodomy or explicit endorsement of extreme sexual deviance. Please don't read my column, sweetheart. I'm afraid you'd end up getting a sex change in Bangkok and join a convent in short order.

    By the way, 5 fen is pretty steep. I work pro bono. Or pro boners. Ahyukhyukhyuk.
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    Are we free to use them to do everything after the payment is made?

    Think I'm able to spare some money this week to get a package...any discount if I buy a pack?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Sai Na
    The bonus will be Astaroth. He does not spit. He swallows.
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Jon Gu - I just got a private order for you even though you're displayed on auction. Now we have a shipping charges hitch. Chicago to BJ or BJ to BJ?

    @ Dando Z, Look at the price tag and nothing more, it will save a lot of your energy :)

    @ Cool, hehe - there are definitely shemales here... they will surprise you soon... and some have pink profiles "Maria" is a good example :D

    Made in GuangZhou is Cheaper than Made in Yiwu? erm... then items 3 and 6 may fall under the GZ category ... Clone is also not a bad idea.. I'm thinking a Clone of Item 6 may look and perform better than the original (and of course cheaper for those who care)

    @ Sai Na - Of course, you buy = you own (at least for first month). Between, size and performance may be disclosed after a deposit payment is made :D (company policy)

    Discounts depend on the items you're interested in. 5 Similar items = 2% discount. Else for category of item 7 = Buy one get one free :D.

    @ Angela Wang - 叮当叔叔 is "MBA" in Private Stock (not for public display and definitely not so cheap)... you can make a customised order for this item

    I, №❶ Passioη, do solemnly swear to sell you only originals, No fakes in stock ;)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Maria is a shemale? Ehhhh Terrible.
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    Oh nice! but have u get a permission from their gfs to allow the buyers to use them freely....

    Well I understand that performance is not to be put on the tag now, but at least u could be more costomer friendly by making a picture album of these goods instead of making the potential buyers to pick them up one by one from the enormous shelf...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Sai Na
    Hahahha, It seems the modern why of selling is to buy the name not to first have a look at the product. You might end up not buying at all. And here is one more thing, to have to buy, it is better you buy at night when it is dark. Otherwise the products on sell, with very limited guarantee, you might end up being ashamed during day time when one product is using toothpicks to walk instead of legs.
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Sai Na - hehe in addition to 'cool's coolness', 'males we ave in stock' means "they are available" which further means there's an automatic approval from their so called "GFs" (if they exist)... + we normally do Payment B4 Picture (company policy :D)...

    However, since the description is next to each item, it could give you a clue of what to expect.. and BTW, you may get more discount depending on purpose of purchase. e.g: ONS, LE, FM, PR, etc... Oops Choose thee thy male, then we process thy order :)
  • Amalie Sæverud
    Damn!I turned down a few when they are voluntarily to be free! And now they are so expensive! :P
  • Simen Stensvoll
    is there any man can do housework?
    and how much?
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Minimy - depends on what kind of housework.

    Dish washing, Item 6 is efficient.
    Washing Bra and Panties, Item 3 could be useful
    Cooking, Items 1, 4, 11 and 14 are reliable especially in italian / french cuisine
    Cleaning your toilets, go for the unlisted item 15. Undermoonlight (only RMB 0.01)
    For body massage, Item 11 indeed. No expiry date ;)

    Remember, customized male also available by requirements (more expensive)
  • 芝芝
    芝芝 wrote:
    hmmm
    my favourite is not on the list
  • silje helene stein
    hahahahaha.... let's count me in too on that auction. :p
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @芝芝
    That means his price is in Euros.
  • 芝芝
    芝芝 wrote:
    haha yeah
    I always have a thing for unreachable men
  • Simen Stensvoll
    does that mean i have to buy at least 4 males?
    im afraid im can't afford to do that:(
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Minimy,

    :D You can get 1 customised male for all the household work (more expensive) not listed but in stock. Can do bathroom, Kitchen and of course Bedroom work effectively ;)

    Price = RMB110, more expensive than buying several males for several functions.
    but the good news is - all after sale services are free :)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Minimy,
    Well, it can depend on what you want at the time. Cleaning the house, then you get the one that can do it. Dishes, then you get that one. Mind you in that category up there there are some that can work as PETS.
  • Børge Notkevich
    No1 Passion, how come your not in the list?
  • №❶ Passioη
    were you planing to buy me? :P
  • Børge Notkevich
    well since ur not on the list, no one will ever know hehe
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Maybe he is an expired product.!!!
  • Børge Notkevich
    haha there's an expiry date?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Yes madam. Some of the goods on sale are past their prime years. So the use might not be long lasting as the engine might wither out due to continuous vigorous use. So you buy and use extremely all time before they expire.
  • Børge Notkevich
    haha are you talking about urself mr COOL?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Nope, the expensive young and energetic products that are not made in Guanzhou are not listed and far more expensive. You will need Euro fair lady.
  • Børge Notkevich
    Well if products comes with British accents, in dinner jackets, as an English gentleman, then I'm all for it :)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Well, you need to be careful when choosing. Australia, Newzealand, Ireland etc make almost the same products, including India.
  • Mathew Abisai
    Mathew Abisai wrote:
    some of the products are poisonous.....lol
  • Børge Notkevich
    No way not even close! I am a product of Australia, they're not that great there. Newzealanders are Islanders, enough said there! Irelanders are all for beer, the pub and football (boring to me).
    English is the quality I want.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    ok, Good luck, but all Britons are taking their hooliganism, like they say to them in football, in South Africa. SO you will need to wait for a while as China makes for you a copy to use for the mean time.
  • Børge Notkevich
    haha, too bad I'm not a fan of AA products, I'll wait for the best quality to come :)
  • Mathew Abisai
    Mathew Abisai wrote:
    my price must be increased because i got an extra benefit.....if u buy me u get a chance to go with me to SA for the World Cup
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Good luck, but the clock is not waiting.
  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:
    But the "Asshole Pete" is the best part, Passion. And the price should be raised for my ability to crack jokes at any time about anything.

    Natural comedians are very rare indeed, my friend.
  • Mathew Abisai
    Mathew Abisai wrote:
    pete blocks accounts...Price tag - - Minus Yikuai LOL
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Mathew Abisai
    Hahhahaaa Now that is product differentiation. They should add a pence sir.
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Pete,

    there is another pete 0 or something like that ("certified troller") - perhaps you should change your name not to look like him :D

    @ Angela Wang

    LOL... I'm the inventory manager, if I'm sold, no one to handle the stock record :D
    BTW, "Poetry Passion" is a replica / clone of №❶ Passioη, ... Similar Package ;)
  • №❶ Passioη
    oh no, that's the guangZhou version of passion though, if you dont mind :D
  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:
    Got it, Passion.

    Rules is rules, Abisai. So quit yer bitchin'.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Passion, can sale items place bids?
    What's the current bid for Gu? I'd like to place a bid so I can have him on reserve just in case I do ever break up with my girlfriend and turn gay.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Oh, I should add that my girlfriend will also make a RMB 10.00 donation to anyone who will take me, reducing my total sale price to RMB 3.5 as far as the buyer is concerned.
  • №❶ Passioη
    LOL... Definitely, auction is room for bidding ... someone (female) placed a private bid for Gu RMB 21 so you've got quite a tough challenger...

    As for your GF, she's got quite a funny way to wanna let you go. I could only think it's a happy moment for her competitors :D (that would definitely include me if I was a erm...)
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    I would just like to say that since it wouldn't be fair for me to charge extra for men, I'll juts sweeten the deal by giving a 4.2% discount to the ladies instead.

    And I certainly don't need more Häagen-Dazs. The more Häagen-Dazs I eat the higher the freight charge is gonna be...

    FOB Chicago, IL USA but available for backorder in Beijing, China beginning in September. All necessary import taxes still apply. Insurance is optional but a signature and photo ID will be required to retrieve the *ahem* "package."
  • №❶ Passioη
    Jon Gu, the Chinese government does not allow imports from the US or any other country for that matter. And even if they reluctantly do, BGS cargo will tamper with the parcel extensively before delivery (very discouraging)... So we'd better move to plan B which is: smuggle you in and intact. Sorry ladies, that makes him even more expensive even after the 4.2% discount

    Price after discount = RMB 14.37
    Backordering price = double the discounted price (RMB 14.37 * 2 = RMB 28.74)
    Smuggling Fee = RMB 200 for freight, risk and bribery
    Total = RMB 228.74

    Wow, jon Gu is getting hotter ;) inventory manager needs to know expiry date with previous owner - or availability date for new intended owner.
  • Børge Notkevich
    No1 Passion: If the description for Poetry Passion is the description for you, then product isn't too interesting. Not much said about it, only give the idea it's not available...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Poetry Passion, limited Edition. well, the editors did not want to have an AA from Guangzhou so they made a limited edition. Need to pay double the price of the highest item above. But the limited edition itself is soon getting extinct and of Phoenix era.
  • №❶ Passioη
    Stella Bella, double price for original or clone? :D original is more expensive...
    ---------------
    @ Angela wang / Cool - hehe... limited edition, that's why it's "number 1" (1 and only). In china we only have "manufacturing date", no expiry :D... buyer bears all the risks. However, more features of item 11 are:

    *Action Speaks Louder than Words
    *Sometimes a jerk and total asshole
    *Has sweet different ways to make your day
    *But will never give you roses to show, Ug item 11 sucks

    All in all, if you like to push ur guy to the wall, feeeeeeeeeeel his abs, then throw him on the bed, this item might be a good one.. erm.... Rest of the features can be found in the pack.. BTW, that's for the clone :D

    --------------------------------

    ATTN: Inventory list updated. Latest additions:

    16. Sun (RMB 24.00) - humble, nice, will not grab your ass without permission SUCKS. you may have a hard time seducing him BUT If you like Mao Zedong, you should like this item ;)

    17. Michael Jaya Agung (RMB 0.9) - Still learning about life in Beijing. All in all, you might not get to keep him forever, cos he's missing something back home.

    18. Daniel Westerberg (RMB 0.6) - Sometimes too serious minded, cold, boring, but that's only because he has many things on his mind. Bed performance is a different story though.

    19. Pomegranate (RMB 1.50) - Lives in another realm of fun, maybe hard to understand but that holds some sweetness too...

    20. Ethan (RMB 1.00 / month - Available only for rent) - This item's idea of possession DOES NOT FIT. So you buy at your own risk. However, has a smart way to fill all the blank spaces.

    Remember, you by from the manager (me). Don't pay money to the displayed items :D
  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:
    Thorstan

    Two things:

    1.) Hold on to that arrogance, but only apply it to those who deserve it. Following that philosophy has always worked for me, and the only people who have ever called me "arrogant" are those who feel threatened by intelligence. Use liberally against the douchebags and undesirables of the world when necessary, but treat everyone else like gold.

    2.) I fucking hate it when people don't capitalize the "M" in my name. It's not a diffcult concept.
  • Kodi
    Kodi wrote:
    DeMola!!! Are you ok now? You get a new liver yet?

    I will not even argue about my listed price.... It will seem like a bargain hehe. Actually 16.00 is a pretty great deal.

    I am surprised no one has picked me up yet @_@ Nikkiebaby.......?

  • Daniel Westerberg
    I think if you add 10 rmb on the price, you can ship me with a bunch of beer included in the price and I get both funny, warm and playfull :P
  • №❶ Passioη
    Stella Bella, no window shopping allowed :D

    ------------------------------------

    @ mr. fRies, Oops friEs erm.. Accept my great apologies. I didn't know fRIES oops frieS erm Fries was really your father's name... Looking like ghost doesn't have to mean having a powdered face... And don't worry about the low price, I will charge more for shipment ;) extra elephant-size container for the over-sized arrogance :D

    ------------------------------------

    @ Daniel, good idea :D... RMB10 only? sounds like Yanjing or Tsingdao. I think german beer + russian vodka + english scotch better.. but there's a tendency for fake chinese attachments which could make the main product seem fake... erm... perhaps the marketing department will work that out ...

    -------------------------------------

    More stock available on private / custom order
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    Sorry Kodi, Nikkiebaby has already entered into private negotiations with me. I don't think she is woman enough to handle the two of us at the same time so hopefully she still has some scratch left over for you when we're done.

    Speaking of which, No1, that someone is attempting to get around you and circumvent the middle man fees by directly contacting the products on auction. She should be warned for this sort of unscrupulous behavior!
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    A sampling of the goods:


  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:
    Kodi
    No, but thanks for asking.
  • Åse Marie Strand
    @ Dando Z

    I think you should know, I think your word-smithing is epic.
  • №❶ Passioη
    hehehe.. jon Gu, I was too sleepy to read well what you wrote.. don't worry they'll not do that.. At least I'll make sure Nikkiebaby doesn't buy both of you at once :D

    Kodi (16 RMB), Jon Gu (15 RMB) - Oh no, after shipping cost calc and discounts, the price is the same for both items. hmmm...

    Nikkiebaby wrote:
    Damn!I turned down a few when they are voluntarily to be free! And now they are so expensive! :P

    Apparently cost is a concern on her side :P... so which of you 2 items would like to be cheaper or free? :D

    NikkieBaby goes for...
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Gosh with the thread about short guys, and me getting a high price here, this is the kind of message I receive now:
    __________________________________________
    Hi Dear, Kind regards I am Babra, tall slim fair and a very good looking girl that loves travelling and dancing, kindly permit my contacting you through this medium (weliveinbeijing.com) hope we can make a very good relationship write me back in this email #####@yahoo.com , see you soon,
    __________________________________________


    Just made my hangover worse! And how come she avoids talking about the price huh?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Saibo
    I think that Babra is a cheat. I have exactly the same message. Be aware of such gals man.
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Haha, don't worry for me, she's definitely a cheat, now the only question is: which kind of cheat? Ladyboy? Gonna mob you for money? Hooker?
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Stella Bella - Delivery Status will be sent to your phone from the marketing department :D
    --------------------------------
    @ Cool / Saibo:

    "My name is miss XXXXXX i saw your profile today and became intrested in you,i will also like to know you the more,and i want you to send a mail to my email address so i can give you my picture for you to know whom l am.Here is my email address (XXXXXXXX@yahoo.com).I believe we can move from here.I am waiting for your mail to my email address above.miss XXXXX.(Remeber the distance or colour does not matter but love matters alot in life) Please rpely me with my email address here kissssssssssssssese
    Thanks
    How are you please i will like you to contact me in my email so i will send my pic to you Thanks From XXX "

    ------------------------------------

    Maybe just spam messages on WLIB and other bloc.net websites.. don't even bother reading them :D
  • silje helene stein
    hahahahaha.... i too got the same message as Saibo.
  • 外交猫
    外交猫 wrote:
    If I'm the Ethan on the new list, I think the price is fair. Multi-month contracts are available, but I'm going to insist that payment be made in US dollar denominated assets. Currently the exchange rate says 1rmb is about 0.15 US cents.

    However, keep in mind that President Hu has said that the Chinese renminbi will be allowed to appreciate against the US dollar soon, so buyers might want to jump on this opportunity now before the price increases on the international market. You could be paying upwards of $0.16 or $0.17 for me in July or August.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Passion,

    It turns out you're the scammer who sends me that message every day?

    Damn, I still had you confused with the guys at sanlitun... You're quite versatile :-p

    "My name is miss XXXXXX i saw your profile today and became intrested in you,i will also like to know you the more,and i want you to send a mail to my email address so i can give you my picture for you to know whom l am.Here is my email address (XXXXXXXX@yahoo.com).I believe we can move from here.I am waiting for your mail to my email address above.miss XXXXX.(Remeber the distance or colour does not matter but love matters alot in life) Please rpely me with my email address here kissssssssssssssese
    Thanks "
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Ethan - hehe your info just created a new line of thinking for our business. something to consider ;)

    @ 莫明 - I wonder why you seem so intimate with the 3LiTun guys :P erm.. either you're taking one of those stuff... or.. erm :X :P just a thought ;)

  • Kodi
    Kodi wrote:
    DeMola, If you need another liver you can have one of my lobes. I thin they are still good. Im strong and natural before the past two years hehe..... Just let me know ok....


    Nikkiebaby is cute and intelligent. Too bad if I cannot attract her hehe.....

    Aloha
    Kodi
  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:
    Ah, I'll be okay, Kodi: Just a summer of nothing but natural highs.

    But I'll take you up on your offer if I screw up. We can do the surgery in my apartment to save money. We can use a shaving razor, a leather belt (to bite on for the pain) and a bottle of Scotch Collie whiskey.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Kodi
    Swing your hips around, she might get attracted. Hahahhaaa
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    Gets too messy for me to understand...Poetry have u got any item matching my personal little preferences?

    Height: Between 170cm to 190cm
    Weight: 75kg-95kg, decently shaped
    Age: 27-40
    Colour: No limitation, but RMB10 for honey or moderate bronze skin, 5 for green, deep blue or amber eyes, 5 for brown or black hair.
    Language: No limitation, RMB 20 for German or Nordic language speaking, -5 for American accent.
    Character: manly (but mild to me), socialble,classy, basic sense of humour.
    Hobbies: Reading(must!), sports(anykind)...the more the better, and RMB 3 for each harmless weird hobby.

    We could negotiate in private for the price ; )



  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    @Pete, don't forget the camera crew. That shit will get you more publicity than anything else you could possibly do, ever. Good old fashioned WLIB snuff film. I'll bring the 2nd belt to strap your head to the gurney. And the straight razor.

    @Sai Na, "basic sense of humour" huh? I guess my advanced sense of humor was too much for you to handle and caused you to retract your bid. So what's the bidding price for guys who speak basic German but with an American accent?

    @Saibo, HTML fail.
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Yeah, typed that a bit too fast....
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @Saibo: if I have to PAY FOR him I need to have some requirements.

    @ Jon: -10....hahaha
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Jon, try speaking english with a german accent maybe!
  • Joakim Berg Solum
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    @Sai, nuts. Oh well. I'm outside of your weight range anyways. You probably couldn't afford the oversized package.
  • silje helene stein
    Height: Between 170cm to 190cm -----> X
    Weight: 75kg-95kg, decently shaped ------> X
    Age: 27-40 ------> check
    Colour: No limitation, but RMB10 for honey or moderate bronze skin, 5 for green, deep blue or amber eyes, 5 for brown or black hair. -----> black hair
    Language: No limitation, RMB 20 for German or Nordic language speaking, -5 for American accent. ------> english with indonesian accent?? :p
    Character: manly (but mild to me), socialble,classy, basic sense of humour. ----> check
    Hobbies: Reading(must!), sports(anykind)...the more the better, and RMB 3 for each harmless weird hobby. ----> check and plus watching movie, playing games, listening to the music. :p

    so..... i guess i'm out. :D
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ jon Gu - maybe Sai Na is simply trying to buy the inventory manager.. :D the stock will be screwed without an effective manager :D

    -----------------------------------

    @ Michael Jaya - How about we do some operation on you? renovate item to suit requirements :D (customization)

    -----------------------------------

    @ Sai Nai - 当然有 Actually there are 2 items that 'almost match' your personal little preferences but slightly more expensive (+ RMB 30)

    Height - 185 and 186cm
    Net weight - 80 and 79kgs
    Shape - erm... masculine? :D
    Colour - Original body colour = bronze but colour is mostly determined by surrounding lighting as the material is reflective. Green under green light ;) brown eyes, dark brown / black hair
    Age - 27 and 30
    Languages - 5 and 9 (including american en) oops, did someone say -5 for American accent? :D
    Character - Manly, Sociable, Classy, basic sense of humour
    Hobbies - Reading forum posts especially from you (if that's considered reading) , Sports - gymnastics / acrobatics, football, track, lawn tennis
    weird hobbies - watching porn, forum freak, running with cheetahs (but not swimming with sharks), balloon inspection, bedroom laundry, - oh no Oops, ok this was not listed :X More hobbies written in package :D

    original item 10 + 30 + 10 + 3 + 3 + 3 + 3 + 3 + 24 (total of other weird / harmless hobbies) -5 + 200 (shipment) = RMB 284.

    Private Order all two? :)

    -----------------------------------

    BTW, Item 3 is about to expire. Give away price = RMB 0.01 .... we have to dispose of this item soon before the environmental protection bureau holds us responsible for pollution :D ... any volunteers? :)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    SOME PANEL BEATING FOR SOME PEOPLE HERE?
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @Jon, for better allocation of scarce resources, men with advanced sense of humor should be left for girls without any sense of humor (they'll treasure them like girls without any property treasure super rich guys), so I wouldn't expose my dullness through biding for u. Moreover, I don't think I need someone to practice talkshow with me at home so basic sense of humor is enough...

    If u could manage to put a strong american accent in monosyllabic german words like "Ja" I'll add RMB3 weird hobby fee to ur price.

    @Poetry, are u included in the two items? if yes I could buy the other one and leave u to deal with orders from other girls...But should the inventory manager receive payments for goods? Is there any sales representative or at least a cashier??






  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:
    Passion,
    I already said I work for free. Apparently you didn't get the joke.

    But hey thanks anyway.
  • Erik Aleksander Aas
    @Sai Nai,

    Height: 183cm
    Weight: 86 kg athletic build
    Age: 27
    Colour: Honey or moderate bronze, brown skin, brown eyes (turns amber in the African sun), freakishly long eyelashes
    Language: Fluent in German, lived in Norway for 2 years but my Norwegain is limited to "Vil du ha en trekant?" Hate the American accent.
    Character: manly but sensitive, social, classy, great sense of humour.
    Hobbies: Reading, soccer, basketball (national colors under 14/16), gymnasium, tennis.

    What's your final offer? : )
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    BUYERS TAKE NOT, ONE OF THE ITEMS ON SALE IS DUMB AND DEAF.
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @ Vincent: ummm, now I understand why u get that annoyed by Chinese gold diggers...while I doubt if my poor wage could afford buying a rich engineer with very big ego~
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    and -100RMB for misspell my name, first.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Some items on display can fail to function in some given cases. A case in point is that an item might find that the electricity at the buyers place is greatly small to run it. I know some buyers have little voltage, so you will need to buy a generator or get a helper so you can use the items.
  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:
    Oh snap.

    Someone just got told.
  • Amalie Sæverud
    well, whoes hobby is strip dance?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Strip dancing requires a soft body. I see some of the items being hard with specific parts that will end up hitting the dance pole.
  • Yaya
    Yaya wrote:
    Seeing as there's no takers for 莫明, I'll contribut another 27.50 to anyone who will take him away. That's on top of the 10 RMB I already offered.
    @Jon Gu,我就是觉得你们俩很配
  • anita sønsterud
    hahahaha
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    谁们俩?我和莫明?你是他的woman?
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Hahaha... See Jon!
    I told her not to mention it since I already make enough jokes about force-marrying you, but...
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Sai Na - :D Original Poetry Passion has been shipped out already... but there's a GuangZhou version available - no warranty, no after sale service hehe... however, the listed qualities are of 2 other similar items...

    I'm suppose to be the inventory manager but due to insufficient skilled human resources, I have to perform marketing, security, customization, quality check, shipping, etc functions too... + work OT :( poor me!! I'll consider buying a robot to play some roles like arguing with stock items like #3 and #6 when they complain about their label...

    @ Jon Gu - "ni HAO ma".. seems your chinese is worse than mine... perhaps we should give more discount on banana ABCs...
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @№❶ Passioη: Are the other two items in Guangszhou as well? Seems Vincent in Beijing matchs my requirements better and I just need 2 kuai to ship him from Haidian to Dongcheng, fast and cheap.

    So what ur quality check job involves? Seems COOL here knows better the condition of each item...

    @Jon...is it that difficult to translate woman into chinese?



  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Sai Na - hehe.. all cloned items are in Beijing... but made in GuangZhou :D ... I think shipping Vincent with all those qualities will require a bigger container... not so cheap. so add two "0"s to your 2 kuai ... except you wanna exclude some features :P

    I check to make sure original items' bedroom qualities are intact. Cool checks the expiry date of GuangZhou versions ;)
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    Umm, I don't mind him being shipped naked, u know, the weather in Beijing now is too hot to stay in any container, I won't abuse my potential pet this way.

    What's ur way to check their bed quality???? And we as consumers have a right to know ur standards.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    The consumer has the right to make a sample of the item as regards bed quality. However, because the item by then is not yet bought, the seller must be there during the sampling.
  • №❶ Passioη
    that's cool cool :D

    Going by the hypothesis that "customers are always right", I'll accept the idea of not using a container ... rather shipped in an over-sized limousine ...

    Oops, did someone say "bed quality"? :D that didn't come from the manager though... but speaking of such, the third leg as a valuable equipment will not be attached to item until full payment is made :D

    Read the terms and conditions :)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    The quality of the item to be shipped in a limousine matters. Guangzhou products can only be shipped in a TOYOTA CORONA.
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    @Sai Na, I was going to say "小妞" but I thought that might not be so polite.
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @ Bella
    The items above are all AA and can only be shipped in a TOYOTA CORONA. The pp items are not listed and are the only ones that can be shipped in a limousine on special oder from specifically approved buyers that must present their bank statements to a committee for approval.
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    Yaya, I will graciously accept your offer to of 10 yuan discount plus a further cash rebate of 27.50... but only on the condition that once you get rid of him, you have to purchase me.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    @Jon, LOL, if you buy me and she buys you, that's going to put us in a threesome arrangement which is very different from the sort I'd been hoping for...
    Besides, you and I have the same sense of humor, and she can't stand me. I'd be surprised at her paying to pick you up after she'd already paid to get rid of me.
    ...unless you're not a terrible boyfriend, that is... Did you know I didn't get her a birthday present? I don't know why that would upset her though, it's not like I get her presents for anything else.
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @Jon, 女人is fine....

    Poor Yaya, I'll donate RMB5 to help u getting rid of him.
  • Erik Aleksander Aas
    @Sai Na,

    Don't mind being shipped in the nude but you better brace yourself for a BIG surprise!

    *ego grows another centimeter*
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Hahhahaaa, i thought it grows for another meter.
  • A
    A wrote:
    One month guaranteed? in this economy we will wait for sales..haha
  • Lady M
    Lady M wrote:
    has 莫明 Timberlake's dancing skills as well?

  • Joakim Berg Solum
    I propose a swap then. How about... you give me Yaya, and I'll give you one of my numerous online unwilling girlfriends who I've never even met... let's say... Sai Na?
  • №❶ Passioη
    @ Aylisan - there's sales for dragon boat festival ... you get 90% off for item #4 Jon Gu. Offer lasts only till 13th June.

    Other give away items to mark the dragon boat fest.

    TonyDice (RMB 0.01)

    Carlos (RMB 0.01)

    莫奕迅 (RMB 0.01)

    More items available :)

    ---------------------------------

    @ Miou - not yet but we could add that feature in a customised version... just for you. what's your bid? :)
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    @ Passion, we need descriptions for the new items.

    @ Miou, I think the inventory manager is confused about customizability. It is essentially impossible to add new features to this product.

    @ Jon Gu, I also appear to have won an online bid for NikkiBaby, we could to a two-for-one deal. I'm not sure Yaya is available though, she may be just trying to clear unwanted stock. Also, I think she'd be much more interested in trading for one of those girls in your gallery... as would I for that matter, is this girl by any chance bisexual and into bald, pale bearded men with sick abs?

    @ Everyone else? Seriously, no bids? If my math is correct, original bid price of ¥13.50 - Yaya's donation of (¥10 + ¥27.50) - Sai Na's donation of ¥5 leaves my total sale price at -¥29.00. That's enough for a free lunch for anyone who takes me home! Do I need to whip out the abs shot again to entice bidders?
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    Whoa dude, seriously? Of all the girls in my gallery of photos, you happen to pick out the one that has been consistently commented on as looking the most similar to me? Fuck it, I'm not coming back to Beijing anymore. I don't want to be sodomized!

    BTW, I dun think she is bisexual but she does pretend pretty well to entice dudes. Seems to be kind of a common thing...

    And yeah. Whip out the abs shot. In fact, here is the ab shot for #4 and #13, Jon Gu and Saibo:

  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Hey, that's picture's a bit too old, I mean I've drank a lot of beer since then so I'm even more impressive now!
    Ladies, one at a time please!
  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:
    Hear, hear.

    Epic beerguts, gentlemen.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    Hahahaha ... did someone ask for dancing talent?

  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    DD, too much fun with HTML and chinese knockoff youtube lately? I don't believe anyone requested that.
    But what sick prick keeps touching that kid's prick?
  • №❶ Passioη
    If I didn't know better I would say this is Jon Gu doing it at 3...

    Ok, now I know it's not... So what's the cute dancer's name?

    I'm seriously thinking of access to this item so that 芝芝 and Angela Wang can also bid
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Aww Jon, c'mon back. I promise not to ,Tokyo you.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Alright, back by popular demand...
    Jon, does this make you any more interested in bidding?
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    Does what make me more interested?

    Unless you embedded an HTML image that China has actually blocked me from accessing in the US, I can't see shit.

    Speaking of which, youku actually does block a lot of it's videos to the US. I just don't understand why... envious of youtube maybe? Perhaps they are so riled by youtube's success and subsequent banning in China that they feel the need to emulate that success by preemptively blocking US users from accessing the videos even if the government wont. Wow that was a really convoluted sentence and I feel shamed for writing it.
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    Oh, the profile pic. Got it.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Maybe China is concerned about being accused of illegal market manipulation for blocking youtube in order to allow domestic companies to take over the market, so they've blocked the domestic companies overseas to prevent foreign markets from finding out?
    My guess is you'll be able to see youku before China lets us see youtube though...
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @ Vincent, how big? Enough to be cut up and fried to fill in my lunch box?

    @Jon: don't put it as u've already caught me, ur baits and traps and bullets haven't worked yet. Is it ur way to treat ur friend by giving him someone u can't handel and taking away his gf?

  • Joakim Berg Solum
    I did mention that you were an unwilling online girlfriend, which basically means that I've claimed you regardless of whether you agree to this or not. Sorry dear, it's just not up to you.
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    莫明, look, I'm learning from you!
  • Erik Aleksander Aas
    @Sai Na,

    "Lunch box"; is that what you ladies call it these days?
  • Joakim Berg Solum
    @Vincent: Epic win. Epic.
  • 随便叫兽
    随便叫兽 wrote:
    Is that vore or gore?
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Lol, I was about to say, there's precedent for this sort of behavior. Refer to cases of
    莫明 v. Jon Gu, 莫明 v.Yuki, 莫明 v.爱米丽 等等

    "莫明, look, I'm learning from you! "
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @Vincent, yeah, we call the plastic boxes which we put food in and bring to office as lunch boxes...don't cook that often nowadays but if it's some surprising material still worth trying.
  • Amalie Sæverud
    What's going on here? Products are flirting to each other?

    Well, if no one can do strip dance then street dance could also do! Who can spin on their head or elbow or whatever parts of their body?

    And who are the parents of that little nude kid? they need to be hung to death! it is not entertainment it's children abuse!

    oh, poor kid! come here! come to your big sister!
  • ****
    **** wrote:
    whouao damm i just realise about this discussion, how long have we been like that on the stand while girls come and go?!

    damm it complicated person?well true at first sight
    serious about love? well right when i'm with the right ones

    a few more things, there is but i'm not the shop owner, can't write it myself, hope he's gonna make the new collection
  • ****
    **** wrote:
    5.50............
    well that's the price for the new collection, the kind of collection that is so out of the common path that the owner hesitate between the high or cheap prices, well enjoy once the sell is made i will go straight to museum has ''world's art wonder''

    i'm a bit like the genius artist who's not accepted by others while working because of his pure mind but get so high once dead.....sad story

    exellence has a price i'm willing to pay
  • Kuan
    Kuan wrote:
    I would love to do business with u if u guys could put actual photos beneath each name. LOL
  • Amalie Sæverud
    what kind of business then?
  • ****
    **** wrote:
    write the name in the search system
  • Amalie Sæverud
    and I can get the business name or phone number?
  • Amalie Sæverud
    well, I'd say eat it is a little waste and sick! At least one should try it first and then decide whether to eat it, throw it to your dog or leave it where it is!

    Someone will work hard to avoid being dogfood, i think!
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    @Kuan
    Products from Guangzhou do not have so many brand tags on them. Guarantee is limited and you sample when the sales man is seeing. If the pictures are put, the factory might end up closing.
  • Saina
    Saina wrote:
    @Nikkie: yeah they did flirt with each other, what's worse, some of the items even trying to insult the costomers, should lodge a complaint to the company.
  • ****
    **** wrote:
    ever heard of free market trade?

    i think some girls would actually like some rebellion from the items, how boring if you just buy, use and throw don't you think?
    it would either be a waste of time or money or you would run out of items.

    it's like when you see a shirt you like then you see something that bother you but the good things here is that with a bit of time and cooperation , you can actually fix it! maybe

    aaaahh this dread like all others start being boring..... leaving
  • №❶ Passioη
    It's your lucky day. Give Away Items to mark the Dragon Boat Festival:

    24. Joakim (free) - A sound funny young man, easy going. A sex addict when he's with the right person ;)

    25. COOL (free) - disguised prick and illusive bombaclack. A good male to spend your fun time with. I mean "fun time"... erm... fun time?... that sounds a bit weird.. anyway, fun time ;)

    26. Peter Baird (free) - half sage, half freak. If you can manage Inspector Clouseau, you can manage this item... Oops

    Ok, not really new stock but new on display. Buy now ;)
  • Alexander Myrstuen haukerud
    呃,如此喜感,不如我也把自己卖了吧
  • Amalie Sæverud
    the last few offers seem fine ! reasonable price with some indications about the performance ! :)
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Hahhahaa, the sales man has now started offering original items on display. However, all necessities of life are free, like air we breath. The free items are a must to have before the buyers get the Guangzou products. Free items are ever in abundance and never whither. So people that want to have them, rest assured that you are having a service that is life long and perfectly splendid.
  • Malin Aaker
    Malin Aaker wrote:
    Say what you want, I'm glad to be part of the luxury products sold at a "very" expensive price!
  • №❶ Passioη
    Don't worry cool... the "free" is just a strategy, we nail the cost on the shipment "fee" :D

    Oops, I blew it!
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Hahhahhahaaaa
  • ****
    **** wrote:
    ..............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................!!

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