Discussion » Dating & Romance » Men Vs Women ...

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹) wrote:
    ...

    Just an observation over the past few years, or perhaps more ...

    Q: Do you agree that home-grown Chinese men (FBC and FGC are not considered here for obvious reason, also not counting post-90 or even most post-80) are not comfortable showing their emotion towards their better halves, or even kids?

    If you look around Beijing (or most major cities in China, even Hong Kong and Taiwan), you will not see too many 30-something or 40-something holding hands with their better halves or hugging in public ... though my memory is foggy, being 35 years ago now, I am very sure my father had never dont that, but of course, that was a different era then ...

    note: FBC = foreign born Chinese, FGC = foreign grown Chinese
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Why hold in public when you can tangle in bed?
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... I might have implied "public", but I was talking about general situation, both in public and in private ... sorry about any confusion ...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Oh, i understand now. Do you mean they do not hold even in private places? Then i can be of good and enomous help to hold the lady.
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Andy, DD older... hahah
    But DD, you know this... public displays of affection are socially unacceptable. Private displays of affection are because affection has no place in a traditional relationship.
    Marry someone stable of similar or better social status with similar or better cash standing who you don't hate, have sex the appropriate number of times necessary have your one child (can't have more, un-filial to have none), and then minimize interaction as much as possible as you gradually try to conceal money from eachother in plans for your escape.
    Did I get it all?
  • Kamilla Bjørnøy
    Just give him o.5% , he don't merit that 50%..
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    @Andy,
    For sure, i didn't say it wouldn't be boring... just that it's traditional. If you can't afford to eat though, affection's a lower priority I guess.
    That's why once those guys can afford to eat, they start buying 二奶.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahahaha ...

    Peter, because there's part 2 etc to follow and then you might see what I am trying to say ...

    Andy ... I am old ... seriously old ... check my profile info if you have time ...

    Mo Ming ... so you are saying that Chinese guys dont display affection, is a form of birth control, after having one child? Well, I dont know for sure, but I dont think that's the reason ...

    My apology ... maybe the thread should include Chinese men of all (legal) ages instead of people in their 30's and 40's ... but then, we must all have seen how today's teenagers show their affection in public in Beijing, hahaha, hence my intention to exclude them ...

    Guys, and girl ... so, again, the question is ... do you think that Chinese guys dont tend to display affection, even in private?
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... John ... always great fun to see you on the forum ... assuming you meant me when you say "elder boy", I am sorry to have to inform you that "take a number and wait for your turn", cause there are many more in this community who had this thought ... NEXT!
  • Hans Christian Eriksson
    the description in ur topic does not match ur headline topic.
  • Da Fan
    Da Fan wrote:
    Men vs women? where is the "versus"...-_-
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    DD, Not at all. I'm saying it's because there was no affection in their relationships from the very beginning, so now that they've had sex with their partner 3 or 4 times and had a son, there is just no reason to feign affection.
    Chinese guys are not well known for their intelligent use of birth control. I am a little curious as to why the 二奶 aren't always popping out kids.

    "Mo Ming ... so you are saying that Chinese guys dont display affection, is a form of birth control, after having one child? Well, I dont know for sure, but I dont think that's the reason ..."
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... Blacky and DF ... what else can I say other than that I am really, really stupid, so I hope that answered your concerns ... and if that did indeed answer your concerns, maybe you can tell me what you think about the "description" ...

    Ming ... gotcha ... and you have described the post-marriage situation for some people ... how about prior to marriage?
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    DD, Prior to marriage, the man and woman have generally met once or even twice, presumably to ensure that they can stomach the notion that they're supposed to have intercourse between one and four times after marriage. I'm sorry, what was your question? Haha
  • Albulena Imeri
    莫明:

    I don't get your humor.

    On the other hand, that's exactly the relationship between my wife and I. Me thinking I am going for Intercourse No. 3 tomorrow.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... Jimmy B ... no 3 since when?

    Ming ... the general statement I wanted to make here, in its shortest form, is: Chinese guys dont know how to "romance", both prior and after marriage ... there are some exceptions of course, but that's what I had observed and been told ...
  • Minger
    Minger wrote:
    Jimmy,
    I think you do get my humor.
    God if only I was joking... I'm hoping for intercourse some time before the year of the horse.

    DD, I agree, I'm just saying it's because they have no reason for romance in their relationships. This is why it's not the case with younger generations, who get to be in relationships with people they're interested in, and might even have intercourse, sometimes prior to marriage!
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Hey, you people need to know that relationships are of many kinds. There are even forced relationships. Contract and so on. You can never tell what type of it people are in. So do not get surprised when such a thing happens.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... cool dude ... we are not talking about type of relationships, well at least I was not ... just a general behaviour of Chinese guys ... do you have more to add?
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    Yes, even in China men can behave according to the relationship. You never know, you might see people walking on the street when actually the girl is an escort. Do you think they will hold?
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... that's a business deal, not the typical relationship we are talking about ...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    How do you define "relationship"? Any people bound together by a common thing are in a relationship. At that time of escorting, they are in a relationship. Hehheeeeeeeeeee
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... but I did say that from the beginning, words like "better halves" ... and "kids" ... so your example of "business relationship" really does not apply ...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    At that time she is your better half my friend. Hehheee. Don't you think so? Anyway, it is part of a persons character. But is it one sided? I mean men only that need to show emotions?
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    Hahahaha ... cool dude, bear with me, this is only the first piece of the puzzle ... I grew up observing other people (not peeping, hahaha) and I have developed a theory about relationship in China, and if this first question goes well, I will continue with the others ...
  • Petter Meisfjordskar
    So you need to educate us on "Relationshipology" so that we do not get it wrong.
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)
    ...

    No ... hahahaha ... I will never be good enough to educate anyone, here or otherwise ... just some silly observations ...
  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)

    ...

    今天(五月十四,周五)刚从"中国日报"看到这两篇很有趣的文章,两篇的题目差不多是一样的,但一篇是中国女孩写的,另一篇是外国男生写的...我刚才看了一眼,找不到合适的帖,就在自己的这一个登一下了...呵呵...

    I just read these two articles from today's China Daily (May 14 2010, Friday), both have similar titles, one was written by a Chinese girl, and the other an American ... but I cannot find a suitable thread for them, so here they are ...

    Cute but whiny? It's sajiao

    By Joseph Christian (China Daily)
    Updated: 2010-05-14 07:55

    http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/cndy/2010-05/14/content_9848092.htm

    Love lost in translation

    By Qi Zhai (China Daily)
    Updated: 2010-05-14 07:55

    http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/cndy/2010-05/14/content_9848087.htm

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