Discussion » Nonsense » Can we change ourselves? Can we change the world?

  • Vicky Hou
    Vicky Hou wrote:
    When I was reviewing some of the topics of the forum, I was thinking this in my head "so fxxx what" .

    Okay, it's a kind & nice reminding to all the Chinese ladies (like me) - Do not sleep with foreigners. But who cares? Life is all about experience, and there is sadness & happiness in every life, so why limit ourselves. Just do whatever we what, enjoy that moment, find ourselves in our inner heart, then smart ladies will get an answer what they will do with their lives. A mature society is that people have the freedom to make their own choice, and decide their own value of life.

    But I was thinking of something quite seriously, how do we (including myself) think out of the box, focus on something different. How can we challenge the traiditional thinking model? How can we be more innovative & creative with our life, instead of following the traiditional Chinese values?

    I watched a TV program about a Germany guy who is teaching in a remote villege in China for 10 years without getting any income, as he believes his action is contributing to the change of the world. But what can we do? Do we care about the society? Then what is our action?

    As a marketing person, I'm contacting different people everyday, but shamefully I see most of the Chinese are just following the traiditional values and thinking model, and I'd like to know more about something/someone different, that will bring a fresh air to this world.

    I'm not encouraging people to challenge the tradition, but just hope we are brave and honest to think out of our normal box.

    Any idea?
  • Ariel Zhang
    Ariel Zhang wrote:
    Just like what the German guy did, start from small things. Think big but act small, Rome cannot be made in one day, right? Be patient.

    Some market is not mature as you can see, but people can make difference. Find the people that has the potential and coach them. Day by day, you'll see the difference.
  • Xiaoli
    Xiaoli wrote:
    what is the chinese traditions/or the normal box in your opinion?
    of course we can change,the world is changing every day.but i guess you have your expectation of what we are changing for?
  • .
    . wrote:
    I always believe we have the ability to change ourselves and the world.

    Sadly, I do realize that a lot of Chinese don't dare to change. They feel more safe to follow the others rather that to lead. Also, I think it is the education system and society that kills the ambition of Chinese. There are so many invisible walls around and it is almost impossible to push them down. People get more and more desperate about life while they grow. Thirdly, compared with people from developed countries, Chinese still remember what is poor and hunger. So when they make decisions, they have more to consider. And the more they care, the less brave they are to change.

    Me, I don't give a shit to challenges, rules or whatever. I believe in myself and I hold a positive attitude towards life. There is always a way and there is always a better way. Sometimes you just haven't found it.

  • Xiaoli
    Xiaoli wrote:
    hold on, you are all talking about changes,but it is a BIG topic. what exactly do we need to change?
    everything has pros and cons, it is not always negative to consider more before a decision is made.
  • .
    . wrote:
    @ Xiaoli,

    What do we need to change? A lot of things. The most important thing now is to change how we treat the earth. Experts have reduced the amount of time that we have left to mitigate climate change to 5-8 years. Some groups such as the Nobel Prize winning IPCC or Bill McKibben’s 350.org calculate it based on how long it will take for us to reach a certain level of carbon dioxide in our air. And Human use of energy is the main source of the pollution that causes climate change. We can either let change happen TO US or we can step up to be CHANGE MASTERS. We can work together to mitigate climate change by transforming the way everyone uses energy. Turn off the light when you don't use it., take showers rather than baths, drive less, repair all leaky faucets, no air condition an empty room... There are so many things we can do to make a big change happen.

    We are the decision makers, stop waiting!
  • wrote:
    别开口闭口Chinese,开口闭口foreigners,世界上的人都是不同的。
    你认识的人并不足够多,不要轻易下结论。
    建议你还是先改变一下自己吧。
    恩,最基本的,找boyfriend的时候别那么物质,还有别说 most of the Chinese are just following the traiditional values and thinking model 因为我敢肯定你基本的传统文化都不很清楚,我倒是觉得对你来说 the traiditional values and thinking model of you 是找个男的一定要有个大房子,再有一辆豪车,最好父母双亡,你不附带任何责任的,不好意思,也许不是特定指的你,不过我认为大部分人会认可我这个看法对most of the Chinese woman in Beijing是她们的the traiditional values and thinking model。所以最后Do not sleep with foreigners. But who cares?,我要说,非常感谢外国友人可以接受这种跨文化的经历,祝福他们在北京生活的愉快,在中国生活的愉快。
    祝大家新年快乐!
  • Vicky Hou
    Vicky Hou wrote:
    看过蜗居吗?是选择房子,还是爱情?网上曾经做过调查,非常不幸的是,大部分的人都选择了先有房子,才有爱情。

    我觉得悲哀!

    The change we need is, 1st of all, follow your heart, not the material pursuit. To everyone!

  • Yuki Inés
    Yuki Inés wrote:
    I love the movie,Vicky Christian Barcelona. Talking about love and relationship values, the story is about different people but not difference between morden/tradition, easten or westen.

    What is the so-called "traditional" of us? Do we really have our tradition? In my narrow-minded point of views, what we think and did today is more of a post-culture-revolution approach. We are so far away from our root and tradition, at least for me, I feel myself all the time so hard to touch the heart of ancient.

    And Vicky, as u said, we need to follow our heart, not the material pursuit. Don't you know that follow your heart is excatly our tradition? (人者,仁也。)Concerning about material pursuit, everybody know that it is from a superficial outcome of a dramatic change from Culture Revolution and political manic to economic market. Pragmatism happen everywhere as a negtive face of mordenism or capitalism. Blaming tradition is just like to ask the victim of rape.

    The world is changing, but at the same time, it never changes.

    and I agree with what Sun said.
  • Warren
    Warren wrote:
    I think being open to learning paves the way to potential change. If you can be a life-long seeker of knowledge (the world, people, things...) you might find yourself becoming more adaptable. I think the questions would be better asked - (1) "Can we adapt ourselves?" and "Can we influence the world?"
  • Yuki Inés
    Yuki Inés wrote:
    Jio, got u...
  • Notoro Kawabata
    Wean Yourself
    by Rumi.


    Little by little, wean yourself.
    This is the gist of what I have to say.

    From an embryo, whose nourishment comes in the blood,
    move to an infant drinking milk,
    to a child on solid food,
    to a searcher after wisdom,
    to a hunter of more invisible game.

    Think how it is to have a conversation with an embryo.
    You might say, "The world outside is vast and intricate.
    There are wheatfields and mountain passes,
    and orchards in bloom.

    At night there are millions of galaxies, and in sunlight
    the beauty of friends dancing at a wedding."

    You ask the embryo why he, or she, stays cooped up
    in the dark with eyes closed.



    Listen to the answer.


    There is no "other world."
    I only know what I've experienced.
    You must be hallucinating.


  • Nixul
    Nixul wrote:
    We can change ourselves, but the first change we have to make should be a change in our mentality by being responsible in our actions, lifestyle, thought as well as the environment which is part of our life.
    So long as mentalities remain the same without any improvement the world will never change
    As the French economist Francois Perroux said: development begins with the change of mentality

    Happy New Year everybody
  • Xx
    Xx wrote:
    im confused
    is it a sin to sleep with foreigers?
    i think we all have the right to do what we wanna do,to love people we love ,to sleep with people we like to,as long as no harm to us and others
    the sleep stuff is quite private..i think

    everybody wants to change the world,but they never think of changing themself
  • №❶ Passioη
    You got it Lily... Phony talks and Bullshit works

    Chinese girls cannot resist the attractiveness to westerners - especially while Chinese boys are still imposing such high moral and physical demands on the girls.

    So they (girls) simply see to have no choice but seek / accept more flexible pleasure and passion elsewhere... This is simple human nature - no exceptions ;)

    Happy New Year
  • wrote:
    №❶ Passioη
    especially while Chinese boys are still imposing such high moral and physical demands on the girls
    ==============================
    №❶ Passioη, because you slept with Chinese girls so that you post an article talking about bad girls? It is interesting you have such point.
    No one imposes high moral and physical demands on others.
  • №❶ Passioη
    @Sun - If you want a true confession, I have factually slept with a total of 42 different Chinese girls (not call chicken) in 2009 - excluding Mongolians, Thai, etc.. but this is 2010, I changed my number and I want to be a more responsible person - that's why I need new friends to create a new and more responsible memory. if you know me on other Beijing forums (e.g BjStuff.com), I usually attack people who dare to talking about sleeping with Chinese girls, I hate it when they live here in China but don't respect the Chinese people. Not only Chinese girls sleep around with foreigners. Many others do too - Russians, Indonesians, Kazaks, Mongolians, etc so I'm not going to make this focused on Chinese girls...

    @Sun - Really, I noticed Chinese guys impose requirements like - the girl must be very thin, she must be extremely modest and restricted from many things she would have wanted to do, some guys keep the girl indoors on weekends yet not give her a lot of attention. It's not bad - but limits her from being her true self. I'm not going to blame it all on Chinese guys because I know many other girls who sleep with foreigners only out of curiosity (not because the Chinese guys didn't treat her well). The rate of receptiveness of western-style immorality into china is faster than the Chinese girls' adherence to their own culture. On this one thing, I agree with Vicky that given the current situation, it's better to "challenge the traditional thinking model", Identify its defects on modern Chinese society, eliminate the culture dilemma by bridging the gap in a positive way. Somehow I think after the baby-boomers are gone, the following generations will apply a lot of flexibility to the Chinese culture to fit it with a modern world. But for now, Yes we need to do something about it.

    hehe pardon me if I didn't say something reasonable typing fast and not looked back hehe.. Have fun y'all
  • wrote:
    If you want a true confession, I have factually slept with a total of 42 different Chinese girls (not call chicken) in 2009
    =================================
    haha, that's good, but I have to say they are cheap!

    I noticed Chinese guys impose requirements like - the girl must be very thin, she must be extremely modest and restricted from many things she would have wanted to do, some guys keep the girl indoors on weekends yet not give her a lot of attention.
    ==========================
    I think only mentally ill person think a thin girl fits my taste; I do not know other's taste. 'be extremely modest and restricted from many things' Are you talking about Chinese girls or women? I never know extremely modest Chinese girls and I never saw any man restricted their behaviors.

    I'm not going to blame it all on Chinese guys because I know many other girls who sleep with foreigners only out of curiosity
    =======================
    You are right; I am wondering why they are curious about western technology or true culture.

    I think you are fine, you are much better than those girls you slept with, haha
    If one day, I have slept with more than 50 girls, I will let you know, but it is a little difficult for me, haha, but not a shame for me.
  • Iain Bonner
    Iain Bonner wrote:
    Hey No 1 Passion - you make figures at the start of the year of how many girls you will sleep with ?

    also i just looked at your page... are you some kind of dictator ?

  • Undermoonlight
    To No Name: what you said is exactly what i want to say--about the obedience of Chinese people to the authority (tradition is a variation of authority)...But followers usually can live, at least, smoothly, while those who think out of box or act boldly often wind up being messy, because the latter will enevitably encounter lots of pressure and resistance--to those materialists, it is unnecessary--life is short, why bother to be so hard on oneself...You see, they believe that, if you wanna your ass be kissed, you should kiss someone's ass at first...this is what they percieve the fairness of life...So, about enslavement--if one wants to be a slave master (or a dictator``kidding?) , he or she should probably become a slave at frist...Still, i maintain that idelogies are the most difficult stuffs to deal with...

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