Discussion » Beijing Life » International marriage

  • Janet Peng
    Janet Peng wrote:

    just wondering, do YOU think it is possible for you to marry a foreigner and live with him/her?

    One of my colleague, she married a Canadian guy. I was invited to their house for dinner. Their life style are so different from mine. I feel like it is very difficult for a Chinese or a so said traditional Chinese to get married and live with a foreigner because of the so different culture.

    What do you think of an international marriage? How and why you decide to marry a foreigner?  

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    One stupid question ... what is considered a foreigner? A person from a different country? Or from a different race or ethnic group? Maybe we just generalise that to someone with different background, perhaps another province or city, or another village, or another tribe (if you are from Sichuan or Yunnan) ...

    I am Hong Kong Chinese, grew up in Australia, and my wife is a home grown Beijing girl ... so she was a "foreigner" when we met, on the other hand, in terms of nationality, she was already an Australian citizen when I met her, so she was not totally a foreigner ...

    So I dont really have an answer about how I think of an international marriage ... one thing for sure though, whether it be international, or interracial, marriage is just a marriage, and both parties need to "invest" to make the marriage work. If both want the marriage to work, then the "difficulty" is part of the fun or challenge, otherwise, it will always be difficulty.


  • Webslave
    Webslave wrote:

    many friends of mine are international couples, even my sis and my bro as well. I dont think it does matter where you are from, it simply has to be a good match. I am a native Beijinger but i actually dont fency to get married with a typical BJ girl, especially not those post-80's/one-kid-pricess ones.

  • Janet Peng
    Janet Peng wrote:

    叮当: One thing I need to remind you is to respect others. I only need answers, or may be with some explanation.

    You could choose to answer my question with a simple "yes" or " no", like Peter. Or you can choose to be silent. 

    Thank you.  

    And thank you for sharing your experience with us, Mr. Not Stupid. :)

  • Pete DeMola
    Pete DeMola wrote:

    I could would definitely marry someone who wasn't an American citizen.

    Anything else would be boring!

  • NN
    NN wrote:

    I think it depends on different people,ya?

  • Man TianFei
    Man TianFei wrote:
  • Janet Peng
    Janet Peng wrote:

    Little Slow:

    Thanks for sharing your experience. Actually, I agree with "learn from each other" theory and I am sometimes exciting about learning new cultures.

    I've just started to know more people of different cultures with different background since last year. I always have too many questions to ask. But unfortunately, still haven't had a chance to exchange living experiences with a foreigner yet.

    For me, I am curious about people from different countries. That is why I want to know from you guys how it works and how do you feel.

  • 叮噹叔叔 (令狐叮噹)


    Just learnt a new phrase today ... "double standard" ... thanks Janet!

  • Jem Lim
    Jem Lim wrote:

    I myself is a product of "int'l marriage" .. mom's spanish-filipino; dad's chinese. and i am currently in a very committed relationship with an american and we are taking things on another level pretty soon..

    mushy as it may sound, but LOVE does conquer all!

    in a loving commitment, differences in language, culture, even belief system won't really matter as much. in my case, i'm born catholic and my bf's agnostic.. but he respects my level of faith as i respect his.

    communication is the key.

    regardless of marrying someone who bears the same nationality,  race, economic status, interests - marriages/domestic partnerships last because of LOVE and RESPECT and these are what really matters but often forgotten.


  • Battista
    Battista wrote:

    100 percent agree with u jem lim

    LOVE and RESPECT matters alot .....

    RESPECT  for the partner and his or her family and culture

    LOVE, well it is said that love is blind and it is also said that everything is fair in love and war

    so if u love the indiviual u will also learn to respect and care about her  and her feelings

  • Tian 王倚天

    Depends where you grew up.

    I ain't never marrying a Japanese girl, because I was raised in a Chinese Communist education system that taught us to despise them, the more we hating them the more we proved me to patriotic. I don't hate them, but I say marrying one would be unthinkable for most people of my generation.

    Same with Muslims and Orthodox Jews...or anyone with orthodox Jews with anyone else for that matter.

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